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Current mood:kubrickian Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
So like, 2001: A Space Odyssey is supposed to be one of the greatest sci-fi films of all time. And it is! Stanley Kubrick did a pretty awesome job on this one. But for a movie that's supposed to be so super-futuristic visionary and stuff, he sure got a lotta things wrong about dos double-aught one.
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Nice try, Stan, but eight years ago we were still stuck with Windows Millenium Edition. Not really big in the conversation department. Not very smart, either. And although Windows may not've killed many Astronauts, ME sure did a good job at turnin' a perfectly good computer into a useless piece of space junk - whenever it worked, that is. No, the only HAL we got in 2001 was Shallow Hal, and we all know how much that movie sucked.
And talk about space junk, 2001's got all these saucy spaceships kinda just floatin' around to Johann Strauss. Okay, yeah, tee hee, I get it - it's supposed to be like this fancy dancey waltzy-waltz out there in space. Great. But where's the David Bowie soundtrack? Zarathustra can sprach all he wants to, but I want my Major Tom! Floatin' in a tin can, if you know what I mean.
And finally we got this scene with a bunch of hairy monkey people worshippin' a giant videocassette. Are you kiddin' me? VHS is so not used anymore. It's all about Blu-ray nowadays. Please.
And what's with all them hairy monkey people in the first place? So what, everybody was supposed to turn into a monkey to start off the New Millennium? Yeah, right. Like that ever happened. Hang on a sec - I gotta take this. Hello? This is the year 2001 calling. Guess what? No monkey people. C'mon, Stanley! Is this the best you can do after teachin' us how to love the bomb? This is such a lame rip-off from Planet of the Apes! You should be ashamed of yourself.
I wonder what 2010 will be like? Guess I'll just have to wait and see!
10:15 PM
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