I happened upon a harsh reality yesterday. The older and more out-of-college I get, the fewer close friends I seem to have. This isn't a depressed, whiny blog. I am perfectly content with the amount of people in my life I consider to be "close friends of mine."

But here is a litmus test you can give yourself that I discovered yesterday. It can be a good guage of how many true friends you have and of how many people are wasting space in your phonebook.

You see, I was driving from LA to San Jose to do standup. The freeways were blocked because 30 miles north of LA there was a snowstorm evidently. I had a show at 8 that night and had to find an alternate route immediately. I didn't have a map or GPS. So I had to call someone who would and could mapquest it for me. I started with my parents obviously. No answer. Then my roomates. No answer there. They were at work. Then roughly 5 other people. One of which, Jarrett Grode, somehow managed to fail at this task even though he had mapquest opened up right in front of him.

Point being, I scrolled frantically through my phone book and realized "Oh I can't call him. I didn't return his call 3 months ago" or "cant call her. Havent spoken since we drunkenly hooked up in the common room in my dorm junior year."

It was incredible the vast number of people I felt awkward about calling for such a simple favor. I mean, we know each other well enough to exchange phone numbers, so why not this?

So, I hereby decree, anyone who needs me to mapquest them something, feel free. Why must we stand behind barriers of "just work friends" or "we just did a sketch together that one time." We're all just people trying to get by and no one knows what they're doing.

Also, please leave your name here if you are volunteering to be my mapquest user next time I am lost in a snowstorm. Also, you should scroll your phonebook now and play that game. You'll be stunned how many people you wouldn't call for this very reason.

Also a big shout out to everyone who came to my aide yesterday. Yall niggas know who dey is.