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Tomorrow never comes...
"The future is not a gift -- it is an achievement" -Harry Lauder
The thing is, "I'll figure it out later" means that later will be either very difficult or never. I'm not talking about things like appointments, "I'll figure it out with my doctor at our appointment", because that's a plan... I'm talking about emotions and personal growth.
"I'll just figure it out someday... when I'm grown up, it'll all make sense." ...?
These are the promises we all make ourselves, and we mean it. At some point, though, this promise of future introspection just becomes self neglect?
In the line of work I'm going into, social work, people say that you've got to have your own crap together before you can truly help clients. The clients come in and they need to know that your crap isn't going to spill out and make their day worse.
So, suppose you grow up and go into construction instead. I've read that it is unhealthy to use a job as a coping mechanism because it makes the work itself lesser in quality and can make social things more difficult to deal with, this is one way workaholics are created. I would venture that someone who is unhappy at work is unhappy because it is the wrong kind of work, and that if they had been mindful of their own desires before they went into their work, life wouldn't suck at that point in time?
My belief is that if "everything later" is the policy, and later becomes never in regards to emotional introspection then all you are creating is a person-yourself-who doesn't know how to deal with your emotions. the range of human emotions is vast, with subsections and contradiction at every possible step.
The future of a well adjusted adult relies on the idea that that adult is capable of looking within themselves and analyzing their own problems on multiple levels. Erikson's Psychosocial theory describes it all best: Trust Vs. Mistrust, Autonomy vs. Shame/Doubt, Initiative vs. Guilt, Industry vs. Inferiority, identity vs. Role Confusion, intimacy vs. Isolation, generativity vs stagnation, and integrity vs. despair are all basic human battles fought within one person throughout the lifetime. After you hit age 13, though, these kinds of things should all be things we think about as often as they come up. An honest and fearless look into the self is a powerful thing.
Everything later is fine... there are people who live out their entire lives without caring much about this stuff. A prerequisite to TRUE strength/greatness is freedom... freedom to roam, to think, to be. How can you be free, though, if you haven't faced these things?
I consider myself a brave person. The day is long past that I was afraid of the dark. I find that understanding of the world around me and of myself is what makes me strong... intelligence is what I have come to believe is the real god. I'll explain that in a later blog someday... but I would like to mention the term 'emotional intelligence' for when I talk about knowing yourself and how emotions can play into a situation.
7:36 PM
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