I am a flawed person, far from ideal. I sincerely hope that when anyone who played a role in my life runs across my name, image, or other reminder that negative feelings are not evoked. I have not always been a good friend but sometimes I was rejected and hurt as well. I feel a sense of Karma at work and I want to cleanse my path. As I review circles of acquaintances from decades ago I feel twinges of guilt, fondness, concern, envy, and sometimes revulsion. Why does it matter so much, these distant memories compared to this year? They are inner layers of my conciousness and cannot easily be smoothed, like poorly wound spools of thread. I am also the product of all of these influences.