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Current mood:  accomplished Category: Food and Restaurants
Dearest Pleco'nians,
Just like the famous compulsive liar George Washington once said, "I cannot tell a lie". Therefore, let me make something crystal clear right off the get go: FOOD KICKS ASS!!!
I don't care who you are - - there has to be some kind of food out there that gets you off like a drunk, slutty red-head at a keg party. I have heard about this Cibophobia or "fear of food" bullshit... but you KNOW they are hiding something under the mattress, whether it be a snickers bar or half a Subway sandwich (barf!). EVERYONE HAS A FAVORITE FOOD! Ever since I met him, Jimmy has been a big fan of almost any kind of food you can think of. He has eaten some truly gross shit just to say "I've tried it" and then rub it in my face like a total bastard. Anyway, he claims that his favorite food is Sushi or Sashimi... mine is rice cakes... and since they both taste similar, I suppose Jimmy and I can add that to things we have in common. Now, if I was going to spend seventy bucks on a meal, it would probably be a nice juicy Omaha Steak with a huge bottle of Moscato to compliment the sex I would be having after dropping that kind of dime on a date ;)
The point here is this: Fish.
Last week Jimmy and I had one of our weekly 'binging and purging' fests at the local restaurant and brewery: The Piss-Stream. This fancy, moderately priced establishment lies nuzzled between two brothels in Omaha's beautiful and bum-infested Old Market. If you ever make it to Nebraska, be sure to visit downtown Lincoln, which is MUCH FUCKING COOLER than the Old Market... but if you have to settle for the Big 'O', go check out The Piss-Stream. As previously mentioned, they brew thier own beer (and some of the best root beer I have ever tasted). Almost everything you order there taste like a diamond (meaning it's overcooked... but amazing!), so Jimmy and I were willing to try whatever they threw at us off their daily special menu. I got the rib eye (extra bloody) with a side of garlic mashed potatoes and what appeared to be a fresh human kidney - but they insisted it was steamed veggies, so I ate it.
Jimmy got himself something extra special: A STINGRAY with a tangy plum glaze on a bed of pasta. Jimmy specifically asked the waiter to leave the stinger on the cut of fish because he wanted this to be an "Extreme Eating Experience"... and that is exactly what it turned out to be...
This is what a stingray looks like after death.
 Wars have been fought over the Root Beer at this place!
Just like a young Steve Irwin, Jimmy goes in for the close up!
 A lawsuit against The Piss-Stream is pending.
After Jimmy's long and risky cybernetic eye surgery, he
felt right as rain and decided that he now wants to be called "Mr.
Cyborg" (which I refuse to do).
Long story short:
We give The Piss-Stream 4 out of 5 stars!
Love,
Pleco Matt
5:07 AM
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