Dateline: Alexandria, Minnesota.
Ha ha. Ha hahahahahahaw! HAR HAR fuckin' HAR! Holy crap, I pissed my pants, laughing at the cruel behavior of the Fates toward TFATE. We're basically good guys, despite some pretty rotten shit we've done. We're sorry if we've wronged you. Stop sticking needles in the little Tyler, Jimmy and Rich dolls you've made. We get it!
Seriously though, we are officially getting right with the gods. All of them: Big Bible god, his boy Jesus, Pele, Ganesh, Manitou, Allah, Zeus, all kinds of Buddhas (portly or ascetic), Shiva, the Earth Goddess...you're all great and we love you, even if we don't give you money. Or time or burnt offerings or attention or anything. All creation is lovely and we feel blessed to have a little corner of it. Can the karmic balance swing back in our favor for a little bit?
Our man Barack caught some heat for saying that, in times of trouble, small town folks cling to guns and religion. Well, we can feel that. Had we not spent all our money on the van, we'd probably have bought some gats at this point, and we're rapidly being driven to some sort of organized worship. VANessa is making the unmechanized world of the Amish seem damn appealing.
Man o man. So now we're stuck in a blizzard, a real HELLA COLD, WIND RIPPING, SNOW FLYING, late April Minnesota blizzard. Leaving Travis and Ann's great house and warm hospitality, we attempted to make it to the show in Williston, but the van was still smoking us out. We stopped here in Alexandria, a quaint little burg. VANessa spent some more time with the mechanics todays, but around mid-afternoon it began to snow. And kept snowing fat chicken feathers. We were talking about chancing it and hitting the road, but we were given pause when the lovely Lauren Leigh Martin related that travel on the I-94 was a grim "very dangerous to nearly impossible." By the time the van was done, it was a little too squirrelly on the road surface to press on- plus some smoking van issues, you know, the usual. So we laid up here for another night, and took in some "Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay." In the words of T. Henderson, it was "pretty fuckin' funny." Especially the part SCENE SPOILER ALERT where the boys are toking out with George W.
Our future plans include staying warm, staying on the road, and trying to get to f-ing Billings tomorrow. This last goal elicted some laughs from a lady at the movie theater tonight, boisterous laughter. Normally I'd say that she and her children deserve some sweeneytodding, but we've turned over a new leaf. I hope they have blessed days, and so should you.
XOXO XXX
-TFATE