Ok, i realized a long ass time ago, that i am not perfect, but if people would please stop pointing it out, i would, be much happier... i know some of you are probably confused as hell right now, but all i can say is im sorry. i noticed a couple of days ago, that like many, they seem to like to critique everyone around them, and yes i do it too. but if your going to be hateful about it please do it to my face and not behind my back! atleast then i know that your saying it and i can push it to the side like i do so many other fucking things, but for gods sake, if i wanted to be a bubbly, anorexic, tanned bimbo, i would have been a fucking prep, but im not. im not saying that i like the way i am, because i know i am bitch, and im not super model pretty, and that i need to censor what i say, but i cant help it, i say what i am thinking, and i usually hurt someones feelings. yes i know that i can change all that if i want to, but what if i do want to? i like being me, its what makes me stand apart from all the others.

someone once asked me if i was hurt as a child or molested or raped, and the answer to that is no, i just know when to keep my guard up and when to relax. yes i realize that i have that whole "fight or flight" method going on, but its what i raised to be. and if you are wondering which option i use, i will give you a big hint, i dont fight unless i have to.

i know i seem to only freaking rant on this blog, but what else am i going to do? but all in all, what i am mainly getting at, is that i am tired of fighting the world for something i cant win at... so there, you all win. i give up, i obviously cant be what everyone wants me to be, i cant be happy all the time, i cant be normal, and i sure as hell cant be willing to change myself to please everyone else, so if you dont like me for who i am, im sorry, but i cannot and will not change, and for those of you who like me for me, then thank you. your the people i can call friends. the rest of you can go fuck yourselves