As most of you will know, the tour was in danger of not happening after my car broke down the week before we were due to leave. We ended up cancelling our gigs with Limp Wrist in Nottingham (bummer) and our first Europe show, a house gig in Utrecht with Karaktermoord and Liar Liar Cross On Fire (incredible bummer). So, first off.. I'll again apologise to the 593 collective in Nottingham and to Martijn and Michiel in Utrecht.. we are so sorry we couldn't make it to those gigs like you would not believe.

However, we did eventually hit the road two dates late with a replacement engine (AND a replacement gearbox - seeing as the garage managed to render my original, working gearbox.. un-working..) and whereas we missed the Friday of Trashfest and seeing some of our friend's bands', we arrived in the Netherlands midday on Saturday and the fun began..

Left Manchester at 10pm the previous evening, ferry at 4am. Arrived in Steenwijk around midday. I'm sure I watched some bands, but mostly hung out by our prematurely-erected merch table. Sold an alarming amount of records considering we weren't even playing 'til the following day. Ate too many (not enough?) seitan triangles and slept in an eerily dormant family restaurant/pub next to the Trashfest camping site. Used an extremely dust-ridden curtain as a sheet, but didn't realise exactly how dust-filled it was until the following morning's daylight. Surprised/relieved I didn't die from severe dust allergies.

Steenwijk feels like Manchester, in that it is all teasing sunshine and torrential downpour. We wonder if anyone will actually bother coming to the venue if the weather continues as it was doing, but thankfully.. they did. We watched our new friends Dolcim and a few others before we played and then.. we played our first ever mainland gig! How very exciting! Considering we hadn't played together for at least 3 weeks before we went away (best laid plans to practice like whoa fell foul to.. work and broken vehicles and such), I thought we did good. People said nice things and we sold more records and shirts. Kylesa selling shirts for three times as much as we were aided our sales with the bargain hunters attending the gig. We all bought Kylesa shirts with our ill-gotten gains. Kylesa struggled with only one guitarist and mystery technical gremlins (we'll go and see them in Leeds in a few weeks for a second chance), we left barely one song into Torche and retreated back to our abandoned country mansion (the same not-in-use restaurant/pub..), this time finding an attic room in which to lay our four weary heads. A few games of naked darts later, we slept soundly.

We drove down to Mülheim and arrived preeeeeeetty early. We met some folk outside the venue and sought advice on how to spend our day. General concensus revealed there was shit all to do. Regardless, we ventured into town and explored, eating tasty sorbet and being somewhat amazed that we'd actually made it and that this was really happening. We eventually conceded to the fact that there was, genuinely, shit all to do in Mülheim and went to the cinema. We watched Terminator 4 in German (bear in mind that Sacha speaks a little German and the other three of us speak.. well, we just don't speak any..) We were the only four people in the theatre, so adding our own narrative and explanations of what had been said was less intrusive than if we'd not been alone. We walked back to the venue and met up with Rob and the gang at the AZ - an incredible funded former-squat venue. Rob is amazing. We ate delicious chickpea/veg curry and rice, met new friends in Fargo and fell in love with everyone. Our new friends Dolcim and Lars (of React With Protest infamy) came to the show to hang out, but we managed to make it so Dolcim could play too. Fargo were also playing but their drummer got his leg tattoo'd and wussed out. Luckily for us they had a friend who knew some of their songs so the Fargo jam-band was born! Dolcim played first and sounded pretty beatdown, then Fargo played (we pyramid'd..) and then it was us. The sound was hellaciously boomy thank to the loudest bass cab I have ever used. After the show, we hung around playing Nintendo (Street Fighter, WWF Raw, Mario Kart and that crazy game that goes 'Speed up!' that none of us can remember the name of..) projected onto a giant screen on a warehouse wall 'til gone 2am. Suffice to say, we love Mülheim a LOT.

Ever eaten a breakfast that lasted 3 hours? We did. Rob and friends made us so much food for breakfast that for a moment, we were a bit lost. Then we found our way and ate solidly until we were in danger of exploding. Blimey. Rob = the best, seriously. A man who shares my stubborn passion for DIY and.. well, he surpasses everything I could ever wish to be. Hospitality beyond all. We struggled to load the car (unable to move due to overeating..) and helped clean up after the previous evening. 

The drive to Darmstadt was a pleasant one, we stopped off in Koln for an hour but ended up using the entire hour to find a music store to buy a few supplies. In Darmstadt we realised the venue was way more incredible than we originally expected. A beautiful, actual, mansion. We met our host and friend Tina and were treated to more spectacular hospitality. Delicious food (nomnompasta!) and plentiful drinks. We played with Toetsen (who were far too good for a first gig, how DARE they practice for over a year before playing? Ridiculous..) and our internet friends Endbringer. Mid-paced mosh isn't entirely my thing, but the drawn out bleak heaviness that surrounded it made it work for me. Everybody was really nice, but I don't think we played as well as we could've. Perhaps we were still too full from the insane breakfast? Either way, we had another amazing time and slept like tiny babies in our lavish bunkbedded quarters.

We woke to delicious warm rolls and our new favourite spreadable edibles and took some pictures of the greatness of Oetinger Villa then hit the road for a reasonable drive down to Munich. I hadn't seen my friend Markus since he'd lived in Leeds for a little while, so I was excited for that and to finally visit Kafe Kult. We arrived in Munich and had our plans to wander scuppered by the persistent drizzle and sogginess that greeted us. We skipped to a health food store and bought.. sweets, milkshake and mushroom paté. When we got back to the Kafe we were greeted by new friend Clemens who was graciously preparing food. Kafe Kult is another amazing space, the likes of which you just would not find in the UK. I spend two hours cleaning the toilets and creating a health & safety hazard for the rest of the evening (in the form of mopped tiled floors that refuse to dry.. for a moment I think of using my towel to dry them, then decide that my towel is best used to dry me in the morning instead..) whilst the others run around like children. I feel productive and in the cleaning 'zone', as it were. Markus thinks I am insane, he is probably a little right. We eat Clemens' beyond-tasty noodles, spring rolls and salad and devour our Oaty chocolate milk (Oats, my favourite grain! How I love thee!) We play with a local band called Izet who are lovely kind folk and play one of my most favourite gigs ever. My bass sounded horrible on it's own, but whilst we were playing.. it was easily the best we have ever sounded, to my ears. Markus thinks I am taking the piss, but I'm not. Best times.

We drive overnight to Ronco, on the shores of Lake Maggiore in southern Switzerland. The drive takes us from Germany, through Austria, Lichtenstein (where I get flashed by a speed camera.. I await Lichten-mail, m'lud) before hitting the Swiss border. It takes us the best part of 6 hours. We are fucking tired, but Switzerland is still the most beautiful place I have ever been.

We wake up around lunchtime and slowly stir. From pretty much every window of the Zucconi family house you can see Lake Maggiore. It is stunning. Every time I open my eyes I lean a little out of bed and look out through the doors to the lake. I am the luckiest man alive. Sacha's mum makes us dinner and we eat risotto outside with his mother and father. We shower and get ready to leave for Milan and off we trot.

We arrive in Milan pretty early and park the car at Leoncavallo. It is fucking hot, I don't have the upper arms to pull off sleeveless shirts, but I roll them up anyway. We walk to the subway and head for Duomo. We check out the tourist spots before demolishing local delicacies and walking for forever to a record store that isn't even there anymore. My feet are on fire and I am dying. We head back to the subway and back to Leoncavallo. I throw my shoes off and curl up to sleep for an hour. Mmmmafternoon nap. Nice Americans in the form of The Goodnight Loving arrive and people chit-chat whilst I remain asleep. Beautiful Italian friends arrive and we are again spoiled with pasta, mushroom&pea pie and cooling drinks. Shows in Italy start crazy late and by the time we are all done, I am a mess. The thunderstorm that has hung over most of the evening unleashes and the rain comes down hard. Sacha drives us the three hours back to Ronco.

We realise that Versmold is a fucking long way away and that we should probably start driving north to Germany. I manage 45 minutes sleep at Casa Zucconi before we again hit the road.

Sacha lasts less than an hour of driving before he needs to sleep. My 45 minutes rest do me good for another hour as he and I tag-team the drive through Switzerland. I get to drive over the St Gotthard pass and it is seriously the most phenomenal driving experience - like driving up into heaven, then just over the crest of the pass, there is bleakness, rain and wind.. we'll call it hell, perhaps.. then the descent becomes like Spring and feels like being reborn. Life-affirming. We drive for 12 and a half hours and arrive in the beautiful German countryside that is home to React With Protest records at half past 5pm. We are on first at 6pm. We unload and get ready to play, I really want to brush my teeth so I do so. I arrive back in the venue room, minty fresh, to a round of applause. They are waiting for me to start. The skies open and a giant rainstorm engulfs the venue as we play - it means we play to a full house, more people than we have ever played in front of. Sacha is more or less naked before we even start. The light fades and we are playing in the dark, dripping with sweat. We play like our lives depend on it and people seem to like it. By the last song I can't even see the frets on my bass.

I am angry at myself for not going to a CMAR fest before, but think I made up for it this time by having the time of my life. The weekend is a blur of familiar faces, people I haven't seen in over four years, new friends, every band being amazing and made up of the best people. We are surrounded by friends, great music and even more food. We sleep at the React With Protest house with a million other people and snore loudly into the night.

Today is a day of rest. We eat, drink, rest and spend another day struggling in the heat. We sell out of the beautiful hand-made CMAR edition of the 'Year One' cassette that Konsti at Gafas Del Rigor (in our top friends, go!) made for us. We are so lucky to be here and to be involved with so many great people doing so many great things. We find a niche market for our shirts - the 'I'm too sweaty and have run out of clean clothes' angle for selling cheap shirts proves a winner. We run out of small shirts and only have one medium left. We again sleep at the house of Ulbrich, help clean the campsite a little in the morning and then shower and head to Münster for some adventurin'.

Münster seems like a pretty young and awesome city. We park up at the venue, a squatted dock-side office complex formerly used by fuel giants Q8. We stretch our legs to the other side of the docks and eat fancy pizza before walking around town for three or four hours. We cover pretty much every inch of the place, but of course, virtually nothing is open with it being a Sunday. We eventually head to Julien and Flo of Alpinist's place to eat and are treated to mashed potato and mushroom/leek/soy stroganoff-of-sorts. It is perfect after a long day in the sun.

We go back to the venue and meet up with the Dolcim guys, this time with Resurrectionists in tow too. We hang out by the dockside 'til show time. Resurrectionists are fantastic and everything I'd hoped they'd be. Sabine's voice is fucking incredible. Dolcim sound huge and play a show fitting for the last of their tour. We are again, really loud and pretty tight. Sacha thinks it's the best show we've ever played, I'm happy with that. Germany time and time again blows us away with the kindness of friends and strangers alike. We sleep at Julien and Flo's place and after more warm rolls and tasty spreads we head south into Beligum..

The drive to Messancy shouldn't take us long, but it still does. Shit traffic when we are thirty minutes away leaves us over an hour behind, slowly roasting in the car. We are the first to arrive at the venue. We hang out with Graf Orlock and Ghostlimb guys, and discover that Hard Charger from Canada will also play. We opt to play second out of five to keep the distance-travelled --> playing slot ratio safe. We set up and the sound on the small stage, to me.. is perfect. We start. I break a string within ten seconds. We stop. I am gutted to discover that the only spare bottom string I have is one of the stupid nylon coated ones I mistakenly bought a few months ago. I fix up and continue. We play to only a few people, as it seems the in thing to do in Belgium is to pay into shows, then hang around outside whilst the bands are playing. The same happens for Hard Charger and Ghostlimb and it's only really when Graf play that people pay attention. Still, another great show that we are only too happy to be a part of. Super thanks to Loic for getting in touch and asking us to play it!

There is some confusion as to where we are staying after the show, it appears that Graf Orlock, Ghostlimb, Hard Charger AND us are all staying at the same place. We are sceptical. Hard Charger decide to head back to a friends in Germany and I try to call Johan in Utrecht to scope out a potential exit strategy but it is late, and there is understandably no answer. Still, we follow the guy we will stay with and the Graf Orlock van and end up staying in a pretty great small apartment. We take a little office and the other dudes take the living room and the kitchen. The guy we are staying with has Geiger books, Japanese porn and a human skull on his bookshelves. We fall asleep listening to the Doors.

We wake up early and leave whilst the others sleep. The drive to Tilburg is an easy one and we cruise through Bastogne (WWII geek, YEAH!) and fill up on the cheapest fuel ever in Luxembourg. We arrive crazy early and park up next to Disturbed's TWO nightliner tour buses. My car looks funny parked between them.

Tilburg is a nice place and the weather is again punishing. We walk through town and find a music store so I can buy some new bass strings. Bass strings are really expensive in the Netherlands, fuuuuuuck! We snack on frites and bakery goods, before settling down in a bar next to the venue. The venue is pretty fancy, and the first 'proper' venue we'll have played. We meet our production team (..!) and are shown our dressing room (..!) and two drinks fridges full of yum (..!).. we hang out, melting in the warmth and struggling to function. Coalesce are a bit late and miss their soundcheck spot, so we set up and soundcheck instead. The venue is a bit like a weirder shaped Academy 3 but more square (for those who live in Manchester), but with a higher and bigger stage. The capacity is 350 (the big room where Disturbed will play is sold out, at 2000 people..) The sound is ridiculously huge and amazingly loud. We set up merch next to Coalesce and meet the guys and lovely gal from Otis and then do our best not to sweat over everything.

At 8pm it's show time and we file onto stage. There are more staff than audience and I introduce us individually by name to them. We start and more people fill the room. The sound is incredible and we play hard. It's weird not bumping into Andy or Sacha whilst playing because there is so much room on stage. The first four songs fly by and people are clapping quite a bit. My bass sounds funny now though. I somehow managed to lose all my onstage sound. I'm assured it sounds fine through the DI and out front, so onwards we go.. I start the first song of the second 'block' of our set out of tune. I retune and start again for realsies. We are done in no time, and all I can think is that I want to do it again. Everything again. It's the last night of our tour and also of Coalesce's and the evening has something of a triumphant overtone to it all.

We sell all but 3 t-shirts and a stack of records. People tell us lots of nice things (some of them even about us.) Everybody at the venue and everybody we meet are the nicest, most accomodating people. We are exhausted and spent, but we like to think we've done good.

Our goodbyes are drawn-out as we pass on hitting a titty bar with Otis and make the sensible decision to head to our hotel (..!!!) and sleep. It's a half hour drive to our Formule 1 motel and we crash out. At some point in the night, Andy drops his iPod from the top bunk and later has to pluck it from atop my crotch.

We are up at 6am and breakfast'd and leaving by just gone 7am. I drive us to Dunkerque and we miss the earlier ferry by all of ten minutes. We have two hours to wait 'til the next one. I eat and sleep on the ferry and start the drive back to Manchester. I make it to just north of Birmingham and have to stop. Sacha drives us the rest of the way whilst I sleep. I wake up just around the corner from Sacha's house. We unload and I take Nick and Andy home, then speed all the way home just so I can get out of the car. I intended this to be a quick breakdown of each day, keynotes and short memories but it's turned into something of a real diary. Not bad considering I just made it up and didn't write a single thing on the road.

A million thanks and hello!'s are due to; Ray at the garage for finally fixing the engine and for footing the replacement of the gearbox when one of his lackies broke it changing the engine, 593 collective and Martijn in Utrecht for being kind enough to organise shows for us and for being instrumental to their local scenes - again we are so sorry we had to let you down, Martheun and everybody involved with Trashfest, Rob and everyone at the AZ in Mulheim, Fargo, whoever the projector/beamer belonged to for Nintendo night, Sean Justin & Matt / Dolcim, Tina and the inhabitants of Oetinger Villa, Endbringer and Toetsen, Markus Clemens and the whole Kafe Kult collective, Izet for letting us use all their stuff and being the greatest guys, Mama and Papa Zucconi for letting us stay in their beautiful home, Tadzio, Viole and all at Freego! in Milan, The Goodnight Loving, Lars & Sabine React With Protest and every single person who was involved in organising, helping, cooking for, playing, attending Cry Me a River fest, Julien, Hendrick, Benny and Flo / Alpinist for everything always, Resurrectionists, Jan hardcore, Loic, the guy whose place we stayed at in Messancy whose name none of us knew, Robert Zann, Graf Orlock, Ghostlimb and that guy who was on tour with them who I swear I've met before.., Japi & Felix and everyone on crew at 013 for letting us play at their fancy venue and for treating us so well, Coalesce, Otis and pretty much everyone we met at any point along the way..

This was a bit long, wasn't it? Goodness.

Oh, and the setlist we played on tour and what releases they are from, for reference and so we don't forget, was..

1. Odin's Doom (s/t 7" and 'year one')

2. Prey (s/t 7" and 'year one')

3. The Holy Mountain (unreleased, from split 7" w/ Dolcim)

4. Mt. Gambier (unreleased, will be on the 10"..)

---

5. Untitled (unreleased, will be on the 10"..)

6. Way To Deny (JOS split 7" and 'year one')

7. Ladder Climber (s/t 7" and 'year one')

8. The Program (JOS split 7" and 'year one')

---

9. Mass Producing Death (s/t 7" and 'year one')

10. Host To Billions Of Parasites (s/t 7" and 'year one')

11. Freefall (s/t 7" and 'year one')

.. on one or two nights we played an extra track, which

was 'You'll Be Clocking Out In Our Coffin', which is from

the Jesus Of Spazzareth split and the 'year one' tape.

-Daniel // Hammers