So I had one of THE most fucked up dreams last night. It was Left 4 Dead (Xbox 360 zombie game that has sold better than Resident Evil) and I know this because of the following:

1. In the beginning, my "party" searched a second floor apartment room. I thought the apartment seemed clear, but we went ahead and searched the whole place. The rest of my party took to the walls leaving me in the middle which seemed odd. Slowly, a smoker started towards me (odd behavior if you've played the game). I, armed with a double barrel shotgun, fired both shells at its head in hopes of getting the achievement where they launch their tongue at you and you blast the bitch off, leading them into a smoky oblivion. Here's where it got twisted. He didn't launch his tongue at me, and he didn't disintegrate into a massive cloud of smoke. This dude was cheating! He couldn't die! I bashed his face with the ass of my shotgun - nothing. He laughed and started to talk, but didn't catch what he said because I cut him out saying "this guy is good". I found that the process of becoming feral like all the others didn't "just happen". It was a slower process like the suicides off the movie, The Happening. He still had intelligence. He showed me that he could do much more than your typical smoker, he could spit bile like a boomer. After his demonstration, I heard an announcement: "Congratulations! You can use this character the next time you sign in!". (Yeah, that's not fucked up...stop laughing....)

2. The infected ran in massive swarms and made noises like off the game. The cool thing was, there were more than 4 survivors out and about. Policemen with their sissy ass pistols, firemen with axes, pedestrians with whatever the fuck they could find. There was a constant army of the infected - multiple tanks, hunters on top of the fallen , smokers hanging survivors from their tongues off of buildings, boomers puking in all directions, while the pussies of the bunch (non special) just chased running survivors. We started to run from the apartment, but heard someone yell that if you walk, the hordes will pass, ignoring you. So we walked (thanks to who ever said that, you really saved my ass *smiles*).

(That's it for the obvious with my mind's own twist)

So after being split up from my group, shit calmed down. I was in a safe zone. I was walking around on a path in town, but some scary shit went down.

I felt stupid. I forgot what I was doing and laughed like one of those back country, been-hidden-from-society type of fucker.

A man asked what was I laughing about and I tried to explain. He told me that stupidity and confusion was the first showing symptoms of becoming one of the infected.

I screamed like I could kill everything with it. Somehow I was purged from the infection and was back to normal (thank you movies for showing me that when in doubt and possibly dying, screaming gives you a second wind *smiles*).

And that's pretty much all I remember. I know there's a part 2 to this dream because I never ran across the witch - didn't even hear her sobbing and crying.

I know I'm not the only one who has had a fucked up or g33ky dream, so spill it bitches!