BLOG OF BEN

I am a Potato Salesman. I deal in spuds.

-What would it be like to live in a beaver dam?

-News from Matt and Ben

-Reptilian Humanoids: Are they living among us

Look behind you.

NEWS FROM MATT AND BEN

Matt and Ben have been extremely to moderately busy, as of late. Don’t know what that means? Well, that means you haven’t been taking your vitamins. ;)

Matt and Ben have announced their FIRST EVER 2009 MALL TOUR! They will be venturing through the finest malls, signing autographs and stealing the souls of elderly people at Dillards. Ignore that last part.

BREAKING NEWS

It's breaking everything.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to live in a beaver dam? I have, and I think it would be great.

First, let’s look at the pros and cons:

PROS:

1. You get to live in a river.
2. You get to build your own house.
3. Property tax isn’t that high
4. If you’d like to add a new room, all it takes is a few more logs!
5. You get to live with beavers!

CONS:

I can’t think of any.

HOT OFF THE PRESS

Reptilian Humanoids: Are they living among us?

Now, before we get into this, you must understand that I have a P.H.D.F.Q. in Reptilian Humanoids, so don’t even think about disagreeing with me.

Ok, now we can start.

Reptilian Humanoids are living among us.

How do I know this you ask? Well, because I caught one eating out of my trash can over the weekend. They love trash.

Wondering if your neighbor is a reptilian humanoid?

Here are the signs:

1. It eats out of your trash.
2. It sun tans a lot.
3. It has scales.
4. It lays eggs.
5. It eats birds and small rodents.
6. It has a forked tongue.

Those are all good signs that your neighbor is a reptilian humanoid.