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Current mood:  cranky
Picture this.....Your havin a great night out with your mates, plenty of beer, banter, women and all the other stuff u associate with a top Saturday night. Even your mate Chris (who you've known since primary school, although you never really liked each other back then) is out. Anyway i've set the scene.......Then.... Someone has the brainy idea of hittin a local night club. Sounds good.........but......im wearing trainers! What in gods name gave me the idea that these scratty trainers would ever be welcome in the high society haunts of Lancaster!
As i approach the door it's already happening, the bouncers (who are most probably the fat kids you bullied at school) are eyeing me up. They catch my eye, see my nervous look and before ive even reached the door a decision has been made. "not tonight mate".... "why".... "no trainers innit? go and get some shoes and you can come in".. "do you know where i live?! Its hardly spitting distance!".... "i dont care where you live, no trainers"
Now this is a pickle, made even worse by the fact that everyone else is wearing loafers and they breeze straight in. Now what happens next depends on how much youve had to drink. Sometimes you take the advice of the doorman and "move along" but sometimes the doorman is less than polite and this is where things get really annoying! Should you swallow your pride and move on or does your Stella Artois expanded confidence force you to grow the biggest pair of bollox this side of an elephant man convention! I have learnt from years of going out that the best thing to do is walk away but many are the times when Ive let a furry of anger rain down on a less than impressed doorman. I wont get into the repercussions of such actions!
One thing is inevitable. This guy has ruined your night, he leaves you no option but to go home, on your own, to an empty house! The fat kid at school has finally got his revenge.............
8:44 AM
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