at least your not Ms. South Carolina right now :-)

it takes perseverance and luck to find the right place for ones talents. you just keep being proactive in looking for the right fit (job) while improving upon your skillset and it will come.

as far as coming in 1st, etc... contests are based upon so many things, perception and opinion being foremost (in my mind). One of the things you should strive for is matching your style and type of filmmaking with the right type of festival to showcase it in.

meaning don't expect a movie about a girl masturbating to place high in a festival that accepts all kinds of films. your film is then compared to all other kinds of genres, and that doesn't seem to fair to any of the filmmakers. have you ventured to send your films outside of the ifckc to other festivals ?

also, do you have your demo posted online ?
 

We've picked a hard business. But don't worry. You've got moxie, and moxie goes a long way. I will validate your talent as one of your clients/creative admirers. You've got what it takes, just hang in there. When you're a creative, it sucks, but it's true.... there are categories of us:

1. No Substance, No Luck: You end up being 35 and STILL in your mom's basement.
2. No Substance, Undeserved Luck: Just freakin' wait.... you can only climb so far before you're gonna fall flat on your face. I'll laugh and spit on you when it happens.
3. Brilliant, No Luck: I can't even count on all of my fingers and toes how many people I know like this.
4. Brilliant, Damn F'in' Lucky: Yeah, they're in Hollywood/New York. F them too!

Perserverence plays a lot into Category 4. Don't give up. How many "Before They Were Stars" episodes do you need to watch to believe this is true?

I married an actor who, painfully has been told by more than one person "You're the most underappreciated actor in Kansas City" like that's supposed to be a compliment to his talent or something. I watch Chris creatively struggle. I struggle with my own feelings of selling out to Corporate America and I realize, after a really tough battle, that's just where we're at in our lives.

The most important thing to keep your dreams alive is to have a wonderful support system, which from watching your eyes light up when you talk about Jody/your family, I know you have. I don't know what I'd do without Chris/Josie. You're going thru growing pains, but don't be scared to lean on those you care about. You've been given them for a reason.

I'm sure you're panicking (even if you don't want to admit you are) about the impending birth of your next child. Women have an instinctive radar to men who are good fathers, and I can tell Riley is lucky to have you. A lot of your issues probably deal with worrying about the next one. I know Chris struggled even more than even I did with Dreams vs Responsibility before Josie was born. The best thing I can tell you to do is to talk to your wife since she'll understand everything the best. Our society is so focused on the pregnant mother and how everything is about her that often the father is overlooked. It's ok to be insecure about the future....it just means you care THAT much.

Personally, I'm glad that you aren't going to work for the rival station who shall not be named. You are WAY better than that. I was so dissappointed in a friend who went to work there and he's told me he's unhappy with the structure there. I wouldn't want that for you....

Hang in there, kid, ya got Moxie and you'll go a long ways with that. We'll discuss more later.
 

I agree with KCKT...

Talk to Jodie - she may be pregnant; but, she can handle it. She's a tough cookie and would probably appreciate knowing how you feel and allowing her to be your wife.

You've always had Moxie. Stick with it. Sometimes you have to take punches like Rocky Balboa before getting that one knock out punch that wins the match. Enjoy the journey because sometime the road to the destination is a hard one. I have been in LA for almost 10 years and I'm just barely beginning to find my niche. You will find yours.

You have your own production company - why don't you add an agency division to it? You already to know how to copywrite and produce. Plus, you have contacts within the community. Find a business partner or 2, make sure that they are talented in the areas in which you are not, put together a business plan. You can even start off slowly on the side.

Many blessings to you and the fam,

Linds
 

By the way...

Not to point out the obvious Brian; but, you have won first place at least twice. Here's when:

The day Jodie said yes to your proposal - she chose you.
The first time Riley looked back up at you and thought to herself "My Dad is my hereo." and you could tell that she was thinking it before she could speak it out loud.

Keep the important things in your life balanced and you will win first place everytime. Maintain a positive perspective and the bumps in the road will work themselves out.
 

Does my Brian need a circle jerk of love?
I love you man, but I have to agree with Ang, that maybe this just wasn't the right time to be making that kind of change in your live. Douce is on the way, big changes are coming. A new job with more work on top could have broken you. Possibly God was watching out for your health.
You're always number one with me.

Rog
 

My brother loves ya , and so do I!

It's possible you need to just stick with what you are doing to make it work financially for you until you can come back kicking harder the next time an opportunity like this one comes up. Do the quality work that you have been doing, show them what your made of. All your hard work will pay off in time. No one ever says how long that can take but believe me it's worth the wait. Your hard work will pay off and you'll be on top of the world when it happens!

♥'s
 

I posted nice loving... supportive stuff on the "I'm feeling sorry for myself" blog...

Now here's another... I call this the "I'm a whiny baby" blog...

Suck it up...

Quitters never win


WINNERS NEVER QUIT....

Maybe you'll win next time... If you work with ME!

Love you... 2 ;)

D
 

I wrote that over a month ago. It's amazing how much better I feel lately.