As I sit here studying for midterms, well not actually studying, but blogging. I can't seem to escape that feeling that I would rather pack it all in, buy a ticket to asia, and just do my thing out there. I need the adventure. I need the chaos. I think thats the problem, people don't realize that I can be suprisingly manic Not in the traditional sense that I am super happy then super sad, but more in the fact that I can be happy chillin on a couch for a few days watching tv, but at the same time I desperately crave the danger and trouble I get myself into. For some reason when I am in the third world a sense of lawlessness overcomes me or at least a complete disregard for my own well being.  I remember this one night in Beijing, it was 3am and My friend Charlie and I got solicited to go to this real sketchy basement bar. Without a second thought we agreed and went.  While we were there, the club started bringing us girls and drinks. We told them not to bring any drinks and we stopped it right away knowing that the bill would be rediculous if we let girls and or the bar send us them.  Anyways, they brought us cokes which I maid sure were complimentary, cuz I knew I wasn't going to pay for them and of course at the end of the night they threw me $100 bill. I refused to pay, but because I was stuck in this private room in the basement the owners of the bar trapped us in and started demanding the money. My friend Charlie started freaking out (being in a 3rd world country visiting with his family). I told him be strong and we are not gonna have to pay anything. Well they started pushing us around in this private room and charlie tried to leave when he got shoved to the ground. Finally we regrouped and Charlie decided to pay half.  He gave them the money and I said fuck no and snatched it back.  I told the waiters in Chinese I will fuck them up if they don't let us go and they started shoving me again. So finally I busted out my cell and said. I am calling the police and your gonna have to explain to them why you messing with a Laowai. At that point they agreed to let us go and told us never to come back. meanwhile, I had no clue where we even were so it would not have made a difference. But the point is that I love that conflict, I crave it and miss it.  Its strange I would never think to put myself in that type of position here in the states and I am not even sure you can, but when I am out there, I am a different person, quite possilble freer.  

Here ends my anecdote and back to studying.