here it is nearly 3:30 in the morning and I'm up being restless.

my friend told me that being restless is a waste of time. it's all in your head and you just need to remember how precious each minute is. he's right.

i remember my freshman year and being up so late doing laundry and being on the internet/doing my homework because the tiny laundry room was the only place i could get wireless. i had to stay up all night because i would sleep through my 9 o clock class otherwise.

that's such a crazy way to live  but it worked for me. looking back i don't know why or how i made it through most things.

this feels familiar. except back then i was so jittery and hopeful for my future. i still am, only now it's foggier. i guess that comes with age.

it's not that you have less options when you're older, your vision for them just becomes more narrow.

it's due time for a trip back home.

people have always said that things happen for a reason. well if that's true then the same can be said for things turning toward their intended route no matter what adversity or change. let's just hope that's true. and let's hope that the outcome is intended to be good.

the same friend who told me that bit of advice about restlessness also made up this nice mantra of sorts. noma noma noma.

noma.

NOMA.

NOthingMAtters.

now seems like an appropriate time to break out into a 'que sera sera' number.