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Lori Ann

Lori Ingham


Last Updated: 4/4/2009

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Gender: Female
Status: Married
Age: 36
Sign: Sagittarius

City: Franklin
State: New Hampshire
Country: US
Signup Date: 11/2/2005
Monday, September 29, 2008 

I don't, I don't, I don't! :(

I'm at the point where I have to go look for a new job. I don't want to. I don't want to leave Christopher alone with a stranger that I'm going to have to pay to take care of him while I go off to work.  I don't want to leave Christopher, period.  I just feel like a bad mommy if I have to go find a job this early in his life and have to leave him alone with someone that I barely know. And on top of that, putting him in daycare would defeat the purpose of going out and earning more money because most of that paycheck would go towards daycare for him.

I don't think I'll be able to find anything because I'm overqualified for too many of the jobs that are available, and those that I'm not overqualified for I'm just simply not qualified for, period.

It just plain sucks. This economy just plain sucks. My life right now, except for Christopher, just plain sucks.

This whole thing is just making me upset right now the more I think about it. I don't know whether it's because I haven't been taking my thyroid medication on a regular basis or what, but I've just been really depressed this past week in particular, and it just got worse when Doug had to talk with me about finances earlier this week. I was in bed crying for over an hour about it -- again, so much that I had a headache all day the next day. It got triggered today when I had to go to a baby shower for a cousin and his wife, and I got lost going there, even though it was only four miles from my mother's house. I just got so frustrated that it brought everything back to the surface again, and I tried my damndest to make sure no one saw me, but I ended up breaking down when talking with my aunt Penny after the shower. I didn't even bother taking the favor on the way out the door.

I wish I was going back to school this winter -- at least we would have some money coming in from my financial aid refund and we wouldn't have to worry so much about it. I wish we didn't have to worry about money, period.

I don't know what to do at this point. I really, really don't.

7:51 AM
 
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Ange

 
What did they say at the wic office? Do you qualify for any assistance?

We are in the same boat with the daycare as you are. It really sucks to work and have all the extra that you would make go to daycare, thats why I didn't go back to work even thought it really would have been helpfull. I didn't see the point of working just to pay for daycare.

I found some coupon sites online that will help with the groceries. You can print them up at home and take them to the store. So far I have not had a store turn them down. www.coupons.com and www.bettycroker.com

I know how you feel about everything. We went through a year and a half of turmoil. Just keep in mind it will all work out in the end. I know it is hard to see that at this point. I went throught the same thing. There have been nights where I cried straight through and all the next day worrying about how we were going to get through it all. I am still concerned about it to be honest but I realized that by worrying I was wasting energy that I could be using to be a better mom to the kids. I spent a good 3 months stuck in a funk so I know what you are going through. The holidays were the worst for me last year. I just couldn't get in the mood of the season.

If ever you need to talk about it I'm here. Or if you just need someone to listen to you cry I'm here too.

Let me know if there is anything else I can do to help.
 
Posted by Ange on Monday, September 29, 2008 - 1:00 PM
[Reply to this] 
Jessica
Jessica Herzog

 
Lori,
I'm sorry you are feeling down. I remember when I had to go back to work when my daughter was only 6 weeks old and it was TERRIBLE!! It didn't take me long to get used to, though, even if I still wanted to stay home with her. What really helped me is that I found a job during the day, and my husband worked nights... so we did not need a sitter. That made me feel better & made working much more bearable. I'm not sure if that is possible in your situation, but it does help to save money too.

Perhaps you can find something part time at first? That way there is more of a chance that Doug could watch the baby while you worked.


Good Luck!
 
Posted by Jessica on Monday, September 29, 2008 - 4:06 PM
[Reply to this] 
~Terri~

 
I remember how hard it was to go back to work after having Jasmine, it's absolutely heartbreaking! Here are a few ideas that might help:

1) Like Jess said, working opposite shifts really worked out for my family. Even if it's just a couple days a week, it would save a ton in day care & peace of mind that your baby gets more time with his family.
2) Try to research places of employment that have a day care center right there, this is becoming more popular and I know of a few places in Keene that do it. It's a great benefit and makes for happy workers! Moms and dads can have lunch w/ the kiddos and everything.
3) With the classes toward your education degree, could you find a job in a day care? You would probably get a discount for Christopher and you could spend the day with him too!

Just some ideas, I know I tried to think of everything when I went back to work. I am very blessed to be able to work from home, and this may also be an option w/ some jobs & definitely worth asking.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Terri
 
Posted by ~Terri~ on Tuesday, September 30, 2008 - 11:11 AM
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