I found these two love letters today off a website a good friend of mine was advertising.  This is the attitude we ought to have about the relationships we step into. 

What do you think?  Agree or disagree, fine tell my why you think so.  I'm not easily offended, if at all, so I encourage you to bring your HOT OR COLD feellings to the table over this subject.  Please, I challenge each of you, be BOLD over your opinion and share it!

I'll provide the website to you at the end of these two love letters .... I think they're very cool and accurate to the attitude we're to have towards our future spouse.

Here they are:

To my future wife,

I found myself thinking about you today. Wondering where you are, what you're thinking and doing. It hurts a little not to be with you, but I can live with that for now, knowing that we'll spend the rest of our lives together. I'm writing this letter to help you understand what I've been thinking about and why. I probably don't know all the right things to say, but my feelings and words are from the heart.

Actually I find myself thinking about you more and more. The very idea of you provides a much needed break from the pressures of dating, relationships and life. In the midst of it all – the thought of you calms and refreshes me – makes me smile, in spite of my situation and surroundings.

I know it sounds crazy, but I picture you – your smile, the way you pull your hair behind your ear, your wonderful laugh, even when my jokes aren't funny. I can't help but wonder what our children will look like ..[endif]>

I've gone out with other girls, but something always seems to be missing. I go out and have fun but the idea of you and our future together is always in my thoughts. It keeps me focused and on track, aware of who I am and what's important.

And loving you, without ever having met you, makes me want to be deserving of your love. So I wait for you – in mind, body, and soul.

I don't usually talk or write like this, but my mind and heart are racing with anticipation. Because I love you, because I know you're out there. Because the very thought of you makes my pulse race, my palms sweat, my stomach flip like I'm on a roller coaster. And what better way to show that I've always loved you than to save myself for you – completely. And I hope that you're doing the same.

I know waiting isn't easy. We're taught to expect instant gratification. We're told we shouldn't have to wait – for anything. Too often we act on feelings or impulses, sacrificing the future by buying into the lie that sex equals love, leaving little room for commitment or marriage. But that's not love and that's not why I'm thinking about and waiting for you.

I'm waiting for you because I love you unconditionally. And I need you to know that what matters to me is not where you've been or what you've done, but where you're going. Maybe you didn't know I existed. Or you thought that we'd found each other, only to realize later that what you discovered wasn't true love. Real love is so different from infatuation or simple pleasure. It isn't abusive or selfish or purely physical. Real love involves mutual respect, affection, trust, equality, and a shared spirituality. Real love doesn't revolve around sex! Real love grows into a relationship where sexual intimacy will only serve to express that love – marriage.

I talked with a friend the other day about chastity – modesty and purity in our thoughts, words, the way we dress and act – how it's a building block for a perfect love that casts out all fear. And sex before marriage brings many fears – pregnancy, STDs, the emotional scars associated with broken relationships. So, in the search for perfect love, it only makes sense to practice chastity and wait until you're married to give yourself to the person you love. And --- OUR marriage will bring with it the promise of forever. We will give ourselves to one another completely, become best friends – soul mates. So even though we may be apart right now, by living chastely for each other in the present we can build our future together.

Have you ever been in the middle of doing something when you stop to think, "This would be perfect if….?" Those words come to mind often – for example, on a Fall day, with leaves covering the ground and crisp, cool breezes blowing, and I think, "This would be perfect if…. She were here." The thought that someday you will be here comforts me.

And… I want that same thought to comfort you. Whether you realize it or not, I've been there in your thoughts, that shiver or the goosebumps you get every once in a while – in the long daydream or a lingering glance. You don't have to wonder anymore, because I'm real, I love you and I am waiting for you – in every way. And now that you know I'm here, I hope you'll do the same. Whenever you feel scared, unsure, or pressured to give a part of yourself away, read this letter. Think about us and how perfect it will be when we are together.

You may have been waiting and looking for me all the while. You may be starting today. Either way, we'll know when we've found each other; we'll be together for the rest of our lives and the wait will have been worthwhile.

All My Love,

Your Future Husband

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To my future husband,

Even though I don't know exactly who you'll be yet, I think of you often. I wonder how you're living your life now. It matters to me, you know, because how you live your life now determines the kind of man you're becoming...and the kind of man I'll spend the rest of my life with.

Apparently, for some bizarre reason, manhood doesn't come automatically for males. Some guys seem to spend their entire lives trying to "prove their manhood" - by hunting, playing sports, driving fast...and, unfortunately, by having sex. It seems rather strange to us women that guys think having sex proves you're a man. To us, it just proves that you've reached puberty. And we don't really consider that, in itself, to be any great accomplishment. Becoming a man is a much more complicated process.

The funny thing is, even in this day in age, most guys want to marry a girl who respects her sexuality. A guy doesn't like the idea of his future wife in the back-seat with someone else, or of her being the subject of a sexual conquest story in the locker room. They'll brag about girls like that, but they won't marry them. They want to marry a girl, whether she's never "done it" or done it and regretted it, who recognizes that sex speaks the language of forever, committed love...someone like me.

But why would I want to marry someone like that...someone who wants to marry a virgin, but spends his dating years robbing other girls of their virginity so that he can prove his manhood? He's not a "real man" in my eyes - he's a selfish, immature boy driven by insecurity, not love. And I'm not interested.

I want more from you. I want you to respect your sexuality as much as I respect mine. I want you to be a real, confident man, not a wimp who has to use women to feed his insecurity. A guy like that couldn't use all of those women, and then suddenly love me. He may be "good" in bed, but he's no good at loving.

I want you to learn to really love. Learning to love is learning to put the other first. A guy who messes around outside of marriage isn't putting the good of the other first. He's using a girl...speaking the "body language" of permanent commitment when the relationship isn't permanent. He's putting the girl at risk of pregnancy. And he's putting himself at risk for some nasty diseases...diseases he can then later give his wife. That's not making love. A real man loves women - all women - and wants what's best for them. And he doesn't let his desires control his actions. He controls his desires instead.

I want you to develop self-control. That's important to me. I don't want to marry a man who can't control himself. Men like that make lousy husbands. A guy who isn't used to saying "no" to sex isn't going to be any better at 40 than he was at 18. I've seen women who worry every time their husbands hire an attractive secretary. I don't want that. What kind of marriage could I have with someone I couldn't even trust on a business trip?

In the short run, I'm sure there aren't too many rewards for a guy living this way. Society tells you that you're missing out on your "sexual peak." Your silence during locker room bragging sessions can seem deafening. You may have even heard from the girls you date that something must be "wrong" with you because you won't take them to bed. Deep down, you must know that having sex won't prove you're a man. It's just irritating to no one else seems to know it, isn't it?

But someone else does know it. I know it. And in the end, I'm the only someone who matters.

And no, I'm not as narrow-minded as those guys who say they'll only marry a virgin. Society isn't too supportive of virginity, especially male virginity. I can forgive mistakes in your past. But I'm interested in your future, starting now. When I meet you, I want you to be a man who has made a conscious decision to wait...out of love for our future family and commitment to marriage. And I want you to be a real man, who's developed the control, maturity and unselfishness that waiting brings. They may not be popular traits in the locker room, but they're popular with me. They'll make you a better husband, and a better father. To me, that's sexy.

I've abstained from sex all these years, and it hasn't been for the lack of offers. I've had plenty of opportunities, and saying "no" hasn't always been easy. I'm sure it's not always easy for you, either. But it will make our marriage so much stronger. Sex will be our gift to each other, our exclusive "language." It'll belong to us, not "us and everyone else we ever dated."

Thanks for waiting for me, I promise you won't regret it.

-Author Unknown

The site is www.teens4jesus.org.  Did you skip reading and go straight to the bottom just to see the site?  I know some of you did. :)