I have been getting all kinds of advice from older women about relationships and what not because I had to ask what am I doing wrong? Im nice.. well sometimes..hahaha but my heart is always in the right place. So I dont know why things never seem to work out. I know one thing I am not the type of woman that can be controlled thats when all hell will break loose!  hahhaa..:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

 The one thing that stuck in my mind is when I was talking to this older lady Ms Rita (R.I.P May 2008)  I swear this made soooooooo much sense to me. This is not word for word but it is what I remembered.... I had to let my mind marinate on that for awhile.

She said, "Honey, whatever you do, don't ever let yourself become a "make-do" woman" I had no idea what she meant, but, of course, she was about to explain.

She continued, "men" don't deny themselves anything!!!! Whatever they want to buy, they buy. Whatever they want to do, they do. Meanwhile, there is the wife or girlfriend, making do with her hair not being done, her clothes from yesteryear, her nails in need, never had a pedicure, scraping the bottom of her tube of lipstick! or rolling up the the edge of her lipgloss like it is toothpaste (lawd I cried laughing when she said that--- that is me all the way it is hard to find the right shade ahhah) anywayyyy Oh, I could go on and on with how "we" make do she said.

And why do we "make do"? Because the car needs fixing, this bill is behind, we have to use our time to take care of this, or take care of that; we're saving for this, working, cooking, cleaning, raising, etc."

She warned me to never become a "make-do" woman, because she says if you start, it is hard to stop and one could easily find themselves making-do for the rest of their lives.

I vowed it would never happen to me. I didn't think much more of the conversation until today (Jan 21st), I began to take notice, she was right. I was making do!!!

Men are a lot better at being good to themselves. Some call it being selfish, there has to be another word for it. Tell me if you know. Whatever you call it. It does have it's place.

When they want to play ball, or hunt, or fish, go to a trailride alone, or go riding horses they go! When they want To buy clothes, or video games, hang with the fellas and want you to stay home or go meet your girlfriends or your mama or whatever their "thing" is, they do it! Have you ever tried to stop one from doing what they want to do? Let me know!  I DOUBT IT!!!!

When I look around, I see a whole lot of make-do women, married or not, with or without children, they are all over the place!

I have decided that I am going to make my best effort to become a "make-time" woman!!!!

I will make the time to do what I need to do to be good to myself, whether that's a trip to the salon, or the gym or the mall. This time I'm gonna take a lesson from the guys! I'm doing my own damn thing! I work too hard not to be good to myself every once in awhile!

So with that being said i wanted to share this with everyone so...All right ladies, single and married... Let's NOT be "MAKE-DO" Women! Let's LOVE OURSELVES and ENCOURAGE each other!. All the sistas hating on each other gotta stop somewhere.... Time to unite damn it!!! There's room for everyone!!!