Liberals Have Guns Too,
Ya Know...

So, the latest way the wing-nut right has found to get everyone's attention is to show up heavy at healthcare town hall
meetings. I don't know what loaded guns have to do with healthcare
reform, but there they are, AR15's hanging on the shoulders of men in
baseball caps, 9mm semi-automatic pistolas strapped, Bruce
Willis-style, on their upper thighs. All loaded for … what? Bear? Deer?
Muskrats? Dingos?
Dunno. But there they are, loaded for something – prancing around with
their hardware fully exposed with a, “mine is bigger than yours,”
swagger. And "I got a honkin' bad, uncircumsized assault rifle."
(With flash supressor.)
Right wingers are always fretting about how liberals are on the verge
of taking their guns away. Which makes me wonder if they realized how
many liberals out here are just as well armed as they are? Because we
are. And, take it from me, because as a life-long liberal. As
such I know liberals far better than right wingers do that taking your
guns away is
not on the mainstream progessive agenda.
So, we liberal gun owners don't lay awake nights, stroking our guns,
waiting for black helicopters to sweep in with storm troopers there to
wrench our guns from our “cold dead fingers.” We know that's not about
to happen, at least as long as we don't abuse our constitutional right
to keep and bear arms.
(Civics
Lesson: Every right in the constitution can only exist as long as those
granted those rights don't abuse them... like yelling “fire” in a
crowded theater --- or shooting up town hall meetings... just saying.)
Right wingers seem to think that only their kind appreciate the heft of
a well-made gun. Wrong. As I already noted, many liberals own guns,
often more than one. And, if I could dare to speak for fellow liberal
gun-owners, here's how we view our firearm(s):
We view our gun the very same way we view the fire extinguisher we keep
in case there's a fire. I'd feel pretty foolish, even irresponsible, if
a fire broke out in our kitchen and I didn't have an extinguisher right
at hand before it spread and burned our house down. Likewise, I'd feel
pretty foolish if someone broke into my house in the middle of the
night and I didn't have a way to protect myself and my family.
(Knock wood, I've never had a fire or break-in, but both can and do
happen, and I'm ready for either.)

That's
one difference between liberal gun owners and those guys packing loaded
guns at town hall meetings. We don't have their obsessive relationship
with firearms, just as we don't don't have obsessive feelings toward
our washing machines, or our lawn mowers or our fire extinguishers.
Guns are just another household appliance, nothing more.
(Imagine
how crazy it would it be if I showed up at a healthcare town hall
meeting packing a fully-loaded toaster oven? Pretty crazy, dudes.)
Furthermore, liberals tend to be more polite than right wingers,
especialing when it comes the handling of firearms. We understand that
flashing guns in public places makes other folks nervous. So we keep
our guns where they belong, at home, in a secure place. I wouldn't show
up with a gun at town hall meeting any more than I'd show up with a
chainsaw. Sure, it's perfectly legal to walk around in crowd with a
fueled up and ready to go chainsaw, as long as you don't assault anyone
with it. But it's also something only a truly stupid, or insane, person
would do... or for that matter, even consider doing.
One more thing. Imagine for a moment we libs started showing at these
town hall meetings packing heat as well? Just how many nanoseconds do
you figure would pass before some armed dimwit decided this was time to
live out his personal “showdown at the OK corral” fantasy? Duh.
So, if those on the right are really worried politicians might pass
restrictive gun laws, just keep tempting fate like you've been doing
the past couple of weeks. Because when you purposely inject loaded guns
into an already emotionally-loaded political/social debate, it's only a
matter of time before the inevitable happens. Then there will be new
gun laws. Because that's how it works in this country. We wait until
something terrible happens, or nearly happens, then we pass a law
against it.
Which is precisely why we now must take our shoes off at airports, even
though everyone knows “shoes don't kill people, people kill
people.”
Think about it, Rambo.
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