I don't regret for a minute my choice to travel across the country where I had no family and go to college, but there are some things that I can really do without anymore that seem to abound in this area.  Specifically, the overly self important and pretentious people around here.  Of course, I did come from southern California where my boyfriend lived in Bel Air and his mom was part of the Beverly Hills crowd who read the society column on the weekends to see if what her friends were up to.  But that was nothing compared to hanging out with people who worked on the Hill or pretended to be connected to people who worked on the Hill. 

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Even now, you can go to so many clubs where these idiots have their pagers on beep not because they can't feel the vibrate but because they want to act like they are important when people turn to look to see what the offensive noise is.  As if!  As if the really important people want you to turn and look at them and wonder what they are up to or eavesdrop on their private business.  I could still go to clubs like that but I am so over being anywhere near people who have to make themselves feel good by inflating their egos in such manners. 

In this same regard, I am so over the pretentious attitudes that have invaded the coffee houses of America where the average people doesn't even have enough knowledge of their java to know that Starbucks isn't good coffee.  (Unfortunately, the Starbucks brand is pervasive enough to convince people otherwise.  Doesn't anyone remember the whole Starbucks fake Kona scandal?)  I understand the need for some types of special orders.  When I was pregnant and getting as fat as could be, I would order skim decaf lattes to avoid the caffeine going to the baby and excess fat going to my already tubby thighs.  On those extreme occasions where I needed a little boost, I would order a half caf skim latte.  But in general, the most complicated my order gets is having a large (or grande for you people who don't know anything but Starbuckese when speaking coffee) soy latte. 

Mind you, I spent my high school and college years when on vaca hanging in the coffee houses of the Pacific northwest when Starbucks was only in a handful of states.  Starbucks, in the eyes of the coffee savvy when I was just a novice to the world of fresh brewed bliss, was known as the place where you went to be seen and not to really enjoy a good cup of coffee.  In fact, there were t-shirts going around that had the slogan "Friends don't let friends drink Starbucks."  There were so many much better places to go to have coffee, why would one subject themselves to bitter, over roasted stale coffee grinds?

One of my favorite places to go was a hole in the wall with a watch repair shop in the front called Café Omega.  It has since become the Tugboat Brewery, but they still acknowledge their history from the time of a watch shop to becoming Café Omega.  My usual was a triple mocha.  One night, my stepbrother and I had five triples and the barista actually decided it was in our best interest to cut us off.  Even Coffee People, was better coffee than Starbucks even with either McDonald's like atmosphere.  And, unlike Starbucks would like to have you think, drive thru coffee is not something new.  Coffee People may be small potatoes now, but they were thriving through coffee expansion of the 80's.  My favorite was a black forest coffee.

Through out my long history of caffeine addiction, my orders have never been that complex that neophyte coffee maker couldn't understand what I wanted on the first go round of ordering.  So what I am soooooo very over are these people who go to the coffee houses, especially Starbucks, and have such complicated orders that they can't even get them right themselves when asked to repeat the order that they recklessly rattled off!

I had the unfortunate experience of breaking my coffee pot right before having guests over and was in dire need of a caffeine boost.  Since I had 10 minutes before my catering order was ready, I walked down the strip mall to the Starbucks (what cheesy strip mall would be complete with out a Starbucks?) where I had the further unfortunate circumstance of being behind this bimbo who was in a tank top, rolled up jeans and flip flops in 50 degree weather who had a bout of logorrhea, i.e., her coffee order, and she was asked to repeat it.  She tried twice unsuccessfully before her successful third attempt, not without help from the girl behind the counter.  All the while I wanted to strangle her and all of us in line had to avert our eyes to keep them from rolling so far that they would go back into our heads and never come out.  I really had to keep myself in check and not scream, "If you can't even repeat your order, what the hell are you ordering it for?!" 

I ask you, what is the purpose of having no foam if you are going to ask for whip on top?  Really?  I don't get it.  Someone please explain it to me.

But I tell you, if I am actually with someone who has such a stupid ass order and can't even get it right and I know the person, beware the bitch slap coming your way because there is no excuse for the pretentiousness of ordering something that you think is setting you apart some how when you probably don't even know what a good cup of coffee is.