SO -
it hasn't been that great.
the last 2 months.... probably 2 of the hardest months of my life - next to the months i was battling cancer.
in SOME ways - this was even harder.... the PAIN was absolutely something i have NEVER experienced before. and the uncertainty of diagnosis and what was actually happening to my body was sincerely terrifying.
here's what happened:
after dealing with the bulging disc and torn ligament for a month, things were progressing VERY slowly. too slowly. then something changed - and i knew it. the pain got worse. i started getting crazy bad nerve pain down my leg that felt like a burning steak knife carving my leg up and down and up and down. the spasms started happening more frequently and lasting longer and longer. i had one this one night that lasted for an hour and a half - i am not even exaggerating. and my pain was at a 14 on the pain scale of 1-10. it sucked.
i couldn't deal. my mom couldn't deal. after a 911 call and fancy ride in the ambulance to the hospital.. i eventually met with a neurosurgeon who heard me, listened to me, looked at me and realized something was terribly wrong.
after blood tests that showed a 158 when it was supposed to be 0-20, and another that was 132 that was supposed to be 0-5, and an xray and bone scan that showed a black mass at the bottom of my spine - he ordered more tests and had me back the next day. when i got out of the MRI the tech said to me that my result had changed "dramatically" from the one taken a month earlier (that got me diagnosed with the disc and ligament issues)....
bottom line - i got hospitalized.
3 ER visits, 5 MRI's, 2 CT scans, 2 Xrays, 2 blood transfusions, 1 bone scan, 1 surgical back biopsy, and 10 days in the hospital (with LOTS of pain meds and antiB's) - final answer:
NO CANCER!
for a few days - we were totally convinced that was the devil inside.
but it was NOT!
i have this wicked bad infection in my spine - PROPRIOBACTERIUMACNE (or something like that). it only happens to peeps with prosthetic pieces and surgery... so they have NO idea how or why it happened to me. but it did.
and i'm GLAD because it is TREATABLE and i WILL be better - eventually!
i'm home now with a PICC line in my arm - dripping anitB into it every 8 hours - they say 2-6 weeks like that, and then a couple months with oral antiB's and i should be ALL BETTAH.
WOOHOO!!!
can't tell you.
after really feelin' super scared that the big C might be around again, i feel a whole new sense of vibrancy and am SOOOOOO excited to get better and back to my life.
the up side? i get to be a diva now and never carry my equipment again! ha!!!
really though - i KNOW that i have to take better care of myself. i tend to over do it - i struggle for balance, and i often think i push myself too far (in all areas - fun and work) -
i am committing to finding my best self and having a blast doing it.
wish me luck.
:)
x
me