I want to talk about something knowing that it won't be understood. Not just that it won't be understood but no additional effort will be able to shed additional light on it. From this starting point I begin to speak, out of need, myself knowing I mean "want".

 Apparently my life journey has brought me to a point of "busy work". Not that I have a lot of menial tasks to do but I am agreeing to participate in something knowing only that everything that I do is meaningless and most assuredly non productive. I would guess a smart guy might be able to define this perspective as a category of belief, or a division of some philosophy. I am forced to accept it as TRUTH if I ever have a chance to know that it IS, and I will.  

 When I say I will, it is with the understanding that I can't, without extraordinary effort and additional desire, knowing that this would make progress, farther away from my goal, that is mostly unknown to me, and this earnest continuation is productive in a way to know that I once again am bound to know that I lack desire.

 How amazing to know that there is one thing we want more than any other. Not the thing we speak in public or even with a loved one but that which is only known by the Creator and maybe by you. What is your thing? Does anything come to mind? I hope that something does come to mind and I hope it is real. It would be nice if I could give you this thing that you desire, knowing that I can't I hope that you can somehow give it to yourself. To know that it is not enough to have the thing you want most is but the beginning, usually of a list.

 At some point we will realize that the giving without expectation was the most desired opportunity. None of us understand that we have yet been able to do such a thing. I hope that you and I soon realize that we want to. I hope that I fully realize that I can't give without expecting to get and desire that I can to the degree that it is bestowed to me.

Silly right?