Only in America... - Can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance - Are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink - Do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front - Do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke - Do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters - Do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage - Do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place - Do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight - Do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creature' - Do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering Ever Wonder... - Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? - Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? - Why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery?" - Why "abbreviated" is such a long word? - Why the doctors call what they do "practice?" - Why it is that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start?" - Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? - Why the man who invests all your money is called a broker? - Why the time of day with the slowest traffic is called rush hour? - Why there isn't a mouse-flavored cat food? - Who tests the dog food that is "new and improved?" - Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes? - Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? - Why they don't make the whole plane with that indestructible stuff black box is made out of? - Why sheeps don't shrink when it rains? - Why they're called apartments when they are all stuck together? - If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? - If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?