Shoulder pad:                          Do you know what it meant to be a shoulder pad? I was an important fashion item. People cared about me…I meant something.

Therapist:                                Mmm hhhh

Shoulder pad:                          (Sighs). I woke up one morning and found that I had become totally irrelevant. Consigned to the dust heap of fashion blunders. And then you look back on your life, and you realise that all you ever were was a support for other people’s self-esteem. It was never about me you know? Nobody ever did anything for me?

Therapist:                                (Click’s pen). Yes.

Shoulder pad:                                           You want to feel powerful? YOU GOT IT.

You want control? I’LL GIVE IT TO YOU.

You want THE BITCHES? THE MONEY? JUST PUT ME ON YOUR SHOULDER, and face this cruel world a larger, bolder, squarer figure.

Therapist:                                Mmm hmm.

Shoulder pad:                          But that’s it see? I mean what I’m trying to say… is…I don’t really exist, I’m just a piece of foam. And whatever confidence I gave people, it was all just a façade. I mean look at me, I’m literally boneless. On my own, I’m just a piece of foam and that’s the hard truth….and when I look inside myself? FOAM- a low density alloy of air and polystyrene. That’s what I have to come to terms with.

Therapist:                                Yah.

Shoulder pad:                          (pause)

                                                People laugh at me now.

STAGE:                                 A coat hanger appears from behind the curtain

Coat hanger:                            I’m here for my 3 o clock?

Therapist:                                Just one second. Our time is up I’m afraid. Next week same time?

Shoulder pad;                          Yes I really feel I’m starting to get somewhere with this.