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As you may already be aware, Takeko "Kay" Rowland passed away peacefully in the comforts of her own home on June 3, 2009, at approximately 8:00 am. It marked the final chapter of her long-term battle with several health issues, the main one of which was Hepatitis C, which she bravely fought against for over 20 years. My mother and I were at her bedside as she took her final breath.
We are extremely thankful for the outpouring of compassion and support that has come our way since her passing. Those closest to her had known plenty about the considerable health problems she had faced in recent years, and provided her – and us – with priceless gifts of encouragement and help. No amount of medications could enliven her spirits and ease the pain from her illnesses quite like the visits from her closest friends and kin, particularly in the months preceding her death, and for this, we are truly and eternally grateful.
However, the main purpose of this letter is to not only mourn the passing of Kay Rowland, but to celebrate and remember her life's journey, one that took her through a little more than eight decades, three countries, and a whole plethora of experiences that shaped her into the remarkable person that she was.
47 words, in a 1 ¼ inch by 1 ¼ inch space. That was the amount of words and space we could dedicate to her in the obituary section of the Orlando Sentinel. Barely enough to give an account of the circumstances behind her passing, and nowhere near enough to describe the long, illustrious, eventful, and memorable life of Kay Rowland.
Takeko Rowland (nee Shiroganeya) was born on April 17, 1927, in Iwakuni, Japan. She moved to Manchuria with her family at a young age, and spent the rest of her formative years in the former territory of Japan. She would often recount stories of her upbringing in Manchuria, expressing her sentiments with equal amounts of joy, nostalgia, and sadness; the friends she had made (and kept until the very day of her passing) gave her plenty of happiness in her life, while the death of her siblings and the incidents she had witnessed during her childhood – many of which were related to WWII – were recalled with grim overtones. Through it all, however, she always maintained her enormous sense of perspective, and cherished all the memories, good or bad, from her days in Manchuria.
As the WWII came to a close and she pondered the rest of her life back in her homeland, she met one Alfred B. Rowland, a U.S. Air Force officer stationed in Japan at the time. A relationship developed over time, and by 1955, they were officially married. Shortly after the ceremonies, they moved to the United States – more specifically, to Alfred's native Missouri. She was among the first “war brides” to make the journey across the Pacific, and no doubt encountered some curious reactions among the locals, if not outright hostility: America and Japan were only a decade removed from fighting each other in a brutal and costly war, yet here she was, a Japanese woman who had married an American soldier.
This is where her reserved, yet powerful sense of pride served her extremely well, both in her early days on American soil, and in the subsequent years that followed. Japanese culture has always placed a strong emphasis on personal honor and dignity; Inazo Nitobe, the author of the preeminent book on modern-day Japan, Bushido, touted them as the foremost attributes of the Japanese nation. Through her many years of living in the United States, Kay Rowland never wavered from the traits taught to her by her elders in Japan and Manchuria, the duty to retain her integrity in the most difficult times.
Kay's ability to hold onto her keen sense of perspective and the overall scheme of life also shined through during her career as an artist. Always an avid painter, she held several exhibitions of her artwork in the United States and in Japan, often channeling her incredible creativity into a masterpiece on a canvas. She also held several tea ceremony events, canvassing the state of Florida to showcase this traditional Japanese ceremony to the people. Even as her health began to decline, she still held a great level of interest in the arts, attending numerous exhibitions and cultural events around the Orlando area.
Her life in the U.S. came to an abrupt end shortly after the passing of her husband in 1985, but she would return with the rest of her family in 1996, marking a return to the country in which she had been a citizen for many decades. More than anything, she was happy to serve as a bridge between America and Japan, often espousing the greatest positives about one country to the other. She was able to make a countless number of friends along the way, from both sides of the Pacific as well as from other various backgrounds, and truly transcended the barriers which may have prevented some from getting into contact with other cultures that exist within the confines of America.
Although the death of her husband in 1985 resulted in a sojourn back to Japan a few years later, she would return, with her family (my mother and I), to her adopted hometown of Orlando in 1996. Mere words cannot describe just how helpful she was in helping us settle into our new surroundings: our longest previous stay in America lasted approximately three weeks; this time, we were all here for good. For myself, in particular, she was instrumental in getting my academic career on the right track, hiring a personal tutor soon after our arrival and easing the transition into the school system. By middle school, my English had caught up to the rest of my classmates, and I was now on my way to a fresh new world of scholastic successes that soon followed.
A little over a dozen years have passed since our arrival on the US soil, and since then, my mother and I have settled in wonderfully in America. My mother recently earned her US citizenship, and I am now a college graduate, looking forward to all the possibilities the future has to offer. For this, we have to give our utmost appreciation to my grandmother; none of this would have been possible if it were not for her work in helping us get acclimated in this country and introducing us to many great friends along the way. She laid down the foundations on which we have been able to build and improve our lives in America, and because of this, we were able to provide adequate and proper care for her during the final days of her life.
While we will never again be regaled by her presence, Kay Rowland will always have a special place in all of our minds and hearts. Everybody who came in contact with her spoke volumes about the enthusiasm she had for life, the unique experiences that shaped who she was, and simply as an individual. Her physical state may have left her weak and brittle physically, but it never diminished the memories and the satisfaction she took from her long, incredible life; that is perhaps the greatest testament to Kay Rowland the person.
I loved this woman. We all did. It's with an extremely heavy heart that I write this to all of you, because she was very much a monumental influence in my life. She always spoke to me about taking whatever opportunity I receive in life and get as much out of it as possible. As demoralizing as her passing may be, it also presents me with a chance to move forward and conduct my life in a way that would make my grandmother proud. I may never live to become quite the person that she was, but if I could emulate the type of class and dignity that she always exuded for the remainder of my life, then I will come to rest a very satisfied person.
That would be the very best tribute I can pay to her.
R.I.P.
You'll Never Walk Alone
In Memory of
Takeko “Kay” Rowland
(1927-2009)
2:56 PM
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