I will be 25 this month.

In my opinion that is far too young to have lost contact with almost all of my clan.

a few years ago if you would have asked me if by now i would have parted ways with the friends i considered family, i would have told you that there was no way in hell it would happen to us.  Lately im not so sure.

I want each and every one of you to realize just how much i love and respect all of you.  You know who you are.

I know i haven't been the best friend to any of you lately.  My life is extraordinarily difficult as of the last couple of years, and i realize that any distance between us is more my fault than anyones.  I don't mean to trivialize any one elses difficulties, and i know each of you have your baggage that you deal with day to day, but these have been in many ways some of the worst years of my life.

I wish i could see each of you three times a week like i used to, but that just cant happen now a days.  It fucks with me on a daily basis.  If i could i would give each of you a couple million dollars and a community to come live in with all your loved ones.  If i could i would arrange it so that we were all together like we used to be.  If i could i would do anything to make you all realize how much you mean to me.  Sadly, those things are just out of my control.

I don't see any of you anymore.  Some of you are too far away, even the ones that are close i just cant seem to find the time to visit.  I wish every day that i could.

You select individuals, and again you know who you are, i consider to be family in a very real way.  It tears me up that i haven't been the best friend to any of you lately.  But i would still kill for any one of you.

I just need you all to know that even tho im not around much any more, i am constantly thinking about you all.  And even tho life has thrown each one of us some serious piles of shit in the last few years, if there were anything i could do to even slightly ease your difficulties, i would without a seconds hesitation.

You are my brothers.

You are my sisters.

Nothing is going to change that.

Please remind each other, especially the ones who don't frequent this page, that i am forever your friend, and i miss you all to my very core.

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