Well folks, I don't know how I'm going to say this so I'm just going to spit it out. I quit drinking this year, and right now you have no idea how badly I want a drink.  Currently there's some heavy shit going on in my life, and as I was driving home today I realized something. I don't have one person that I can turn to when I'm feeling down. Let's go back 2 years, I was very close to my friends and open about what was bothering me.  But due to my drinking I started bottling my feelings up and keeping to myself; I also had alienated some very good friends of mine. Ones that could read me like a book and are able to tell if something was bothering me just by the look in my eyes. And as I was driving home I also realized that I really don't trust anyone enough to open up too.  I've made it almost 6 months now that I haven't had a drink, and as I type that's the only thing on my mind. Right now I feel like that my whole world is crashing down on me and I did it all to my self, and I cant do anything to stop it.

When we were kids all we wanted was to be grown up and be free, but now I wish I was a kid, no worries, no cares, bills, job, just enjoy  life everyday, and take it for what its worth…..Maybe by writing this I can see If, there really people that care and worth trusting. I know that I have subscribers, but what I want to know is there really anyone else out there that cares enough and reads my shit?

Well it's late, and I should be going to bed