AHHHHH!!!!! people keep hurting me! every day, i get hurt by someone new. this sucks. i care so much about just the well being of humans , i mean, i am one and i'd like it if my children get to raise children and their children get to raise children and just all in all they get to experiences the joys of life like happy love, we're best friends love, i trust you love. i am so hurt right now. i dont understand. i look to myself because it must be something ive done to deserve this, right? but i dont know what im doing. ive been God first and ive been grateful what i have and ive tried to just be nice, but why am i so misunderstood? am i just being sensitive? i am really sensitive and i keep it to myself but maybe people keep being this way to me because they dont know it hurts me. it really hurts! it really hurts me when you say you are going to call me and you dont. it really hurts me when you say youre coming over to kick it and hang out and you dont. it really hurts me when you lie to me. it really hurts me when you tell me something and its not what youre saying its what youre not saying that im supposed to get. it really hurts me when i share my weakness i open up and you use it against me, you bring it up later to bring yourself up over me. sometimes, i feel like fuck this whole human race. the things we do to eachother. if we become extinct, from killing ourselves, hey, we deserve it. and so be it. i wouldnt want my children to suffer the way youve made me suffer anyway. i dont want them to have to live a life of hurt and then when they kill themselves you call them weak. but it wasnt them, it was you. why are you being that way? dont you know you dont have to? but i tell myself, the suffering a person has caused me, they suffer far more, for one can only give what one has, accept it and move on. but sometimes, i cant stand to accept it and just move on! lets deal with this! im tired of you treating me this way! yea, im the nice guy, but i can be an asshole. yea, im laid back, but keep pushing and ill make you eat my pain, then ill hold your throat so that shit gets stuck and you cant breathe. yea, just like your hurt is suffocating me! but im not eye for an eye. i dont want the whole world to go blind. i tell myself, thats just not me! i wont do unto you as youve done unto me. but whose going to do it, if i dont?? i try to trust in God and trust the Universe will do its thing. wow, this has helped. im ok now.

my solution: i will continue to trust in God and put God first! i will know, its only me and God anyway! i will be one with the Universe! i will be one with Oneness and All That Is! and i will live like i have something to die for!