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Category: Writing and Poetry
PHOENIX HEART
(To my wife Janet on the first anniversary of her Mother's passing)
I
I can feel the pain in this house,
its everywhere,
it overwhelms at times,
squeezing my lungs still,
because I don't know how to help
All I want is to cleanse
you of your grief,
fill the now empty space
with her love
Put you in her arms once more,
comforting hands on your back
Her loving voice,
saying just what you need to hear.
She wasn't just your Mother,
she was your best friend.
Now we live in her house,
enclosed in reminders and memories
and try to make it our home.
Sometimes
it seems impossible.
Sometimes
it seems as if this
staggering awkwardness
is all we'll ever be
But somehow I know
that if I can remind you
of what you truly are,
what your mother always knew was there,
even when she couldn't tell you;
If I remind you that the light
inside you is brighter than any
Beacon
could ever hope to be;
If I don't allow you give up,
you Will overcome this sorrow,
this emptiness,
as you have overcome so much already
I believe your Mother will insist upon it.
II
I haven't always been
what I should for you
I have made mistakes that I
will forever regret
But these things,
they don't change how I feel.
I'm not going anywhere.
My future's only promise,
is you.
My only currency,
is love.
All I can leave behind
in this world are
trinkets and oddities,
unworthy of consideration.
So I will use everything
that I have, everything I am
to hold you up
when you can no longer
stand up.
Stand up
beside you when
the darkness threatens to
surround you.
Surround you
in all the love and comfort
of these arms and this heart
when the nightmares come.
You are not alone.
When you are lost,
I will find you.
When the agony consumes you,
I will be the ashes
from which you rise;
protection as you heal.
Please, accept this offering,
I do not make it lightly.
It is the most I can give you,
now and forever
-although it is already yours;
It is my soul.
© 2009 Michael Egidio Quigg
6:57 PM
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