"Out"

I'm back to my bed,
lying on my stomach,
sniffling back tears.
Today was fine,
a passable 24 hours.
Until, when at home,
it all blew in my face.
It's sad and pathetic,
my own cat doesn't love me.
I try to show him some affection,
and he CLAWS MY FUCKING FACE.
I give him a slap,
"BAD KITTY!" I say.
Then the comments from
those two shits come.
They bitch and they yell,
they hiss and they frown.
Then the tears start running,
and they jeer me up the stairs.
It's not just the cat,
it's this never-ending time period
of your disapproving shouts.
Sorry, I'm not first rate.
Sorry, I'm not like him.
Sorry, I can't take your "tough love."
Sorry...I don't WANT TO BE SORRY!
I hold in my screams
and feel blood vessels burst behind my eyes.
Feels like my brain inflating into tumors.
I just wanted to come home
to an air conditioned house,
to loving pets,
to make the family dinner.
Fuck you.
You can cook for once.
I want out.