The following blog contains crude attempts at humor which may not necessarily be factual. If you're offended, get a life or something.So, it was my birthday today. After their early 20s, many adults' birthdays seem to lose any special excitement, and so it is with me. My wife and I went out to a deli we enjoy and ate food that we would later regret eating. We proceeded to a local big box bookstore (it was the only one open at the time) and read books we didn't intend to buy. I won't complain about it; it was a nice day. But, you'd be surprised to know how many better-known events happened on this date (06 January):
* Christians who recognize the Julian Calendar celebrate Christmas on January 6th; Christians who follow the Gregorian calendar celebrate Epiphany. (Which begs the question: after 2,000 years, why can't we settle on something?)
* In 1497, the Jewish population of Graz, Syria was expelled. In January 1498, the tax-time shortage of CPAs led to riots and mass-suicides.
* In 1773, slaves in the then-colony of Massachusetts petitioned the legislature for freedom. On the same date in 1988, the Boston Celtics petitioned coach Chris Ford for freedom from their lanky, mostly-white starting line-up.
* In 1838 Samuel, Morse made the first public demonstration of his telegraph system in Morristown, NJ. His "code-logs" (shortened in the popular vernacular to "'clogs") were popular until the public got tired of his bad poetry and constant arguments for how Stephen Foster's songs are sooo much better than Geoge Frederick Root's.
* In 1912, the American state of New Mexico was admitted as the 47th state. Yet-to-be-born hippies, peyote aficionados and new-agers rejoiced.
* In 1941, Pan American Airlines completed the history's first around-the-world commercial flight in New York. (...but the luggage went to Cincinnati. Pan Am apologized for any inconveniences that it may have caused.)
* In 1945, Future President of the United States George Bush married the former Barbara Pierce in Rye, NY. Under a lunar eclipse with ceremonial candles lit and black-robed witnesses chanting backwards in Latin, they would conceive
another future President.
* In 1955, AC/DC rhythm guitarist Malcom young was born in Glasgow, Scotland (and he knows just as many chords now as he did then). ..m/
* In 1957, Judaic school Yeshiva Kol Ya'ackov opened in Moscow, but one
Jewish joke per blog is usually my limit.
* In 1958, Guitar maker Gibson introduced the first 'flying V' electric model. Twenty-five years later, Jackson guitars
perfected it.
* In 1977, the Sex Pistols were dropped by EMI Records after charming guitarist Steve Jones called sauced-up talk show host Bill Grundy a "dirty sod" and a "fucking rotter" on the air. (Since I don't speak Brit-ese, I'm not clear on what a "sod" or a "rotter" is, but I think the "f-word" got Opie and Anthony in trouble a few times.)
* In 1980, President Jimmy Carter and the Congress set a precedent for government-sanctioned corporate welfare by agreeing to bail Chrysler's bloated, cash-strapped ass out of the abyss of certain bankruptcy. Thanks guys. I mean, what would the world automotive market do without the rust-addled, gas-sucking, mechanically-challenged K-Cars, Lazers and LeBarons Chryslers would go on make in the 80s?
* In 1994, an "associate" of Goon Supreme Jeff Gillooly attacked horse-toothed figure-skater Nancy Kerrigan with a club, endangering her chance at making the Olympic trials. Gillooly's "goil", trashy skater Tonya Harding, considered Kerrigan her biggest rival in the competition.
and, in 2001, after nearly 2 months of recounts, the U. S. Congress certified the 2000 Presidential election, awarding the office to Texas Governor and product of George and Barbara's unholy copulation: George W. Bush.
Yes, there were some monumental events that occurred on the same date of my birth. So, maybe nothing like the Magna Carta being signed or the Surrender of the Confederacy at Appomattox or the release of Metallica's
Ride the Lightning album happened on my birthday, but I'll take what I can get!
If, at this point, you haven't resorted to something drastic to make the hurting stop, you can read more of my wit 'n' wisdom at http://rationreality.com