to see me as i am and still see beauty. i thought that was beyond human capability, but you've found a way to disconfirm my hypotheses. . and i must learn to trust you.

i hear love is giving someone the power to hurt you, and trust that they will choose not to, at least not intentionally. i admit that makes me a bit uncomfortable.

because i've known the warmth of daggers ripping through my chest. Gasping for air 'cuz i had no obama left, felt death reaching for me in my lonliest hours as tears bathed my face.

so to be honest, i'd rather choose the echoes of my cries over the risk of another failed heart. . .a cat has nine lives, i. . . . i have only one.

it's no mystery to you. i've tucked my heart in my sleeve. . . i don't know how to receive what's perfect. .

because i'm imperfect, disabled, broken, incomplete, constantly working towards a perfection, never earning enough points to deserve the arms you leave open every time i fall.

it seems i cannot defeat you, love.