I
may have shared bits and pieces of this in the past, I don’t really
remember, but forty years ago tomorrow (It was August 15, 1969) I was
along some county or state highway in mid state New York walking to a
place that I had no idea would become legendary.
August 15,
1969, it was a Friday. It was my 18th birthday. My birthday present
from my parents were tickets to a music and arts festival that I’m sure
they never imagined would be so significant in my own life or that of
my generation. I’m sure if they’d known better I would never been
given permission to go.
We’d set up our tent and left the car
in some farmer’s field. I’m walking down this highway, in the middle
of a traffic jam, just following everyone in front of us. We turn down
this side road, down the road we can see where everyone was moving
more to the right and what appeared to be into the woods. We passed a
lot of porta potties and not to far past them in this clearing, just
before the woods, was what appeared to be an encampment. Walking past
I noticed what looked like school buses and every sort and color and a
small staging area. I did not know at the time, but was told later
that was the Grateful Deads entourage.
We passed some fences
that were not fully erected, and heard somebody declaring it was now a
free concert. At this point it was pretty easy to know which direction
to head to, just follow the sound of the music. We came out of the
woods along the ridge at the top of the hill. To our right going
further up the hill we could see some A frame like structures.
Directly in front of us we could see the light towers and sound booth
and beyond that a large stage and one hell of a sound system. But
between that stage and to our left and to our right a sea of people
that I found virtually unfathomable. I had been to Anti-War and peace
demonstrations on the Mall in Washington, DC and thought I understood
what masses of people were, but this was pure fantasy.
I do not
have a clue what artist was onstage, at the time I know it was some of
the lighter fare. But at this point the music really didn’t matter.
There was something bigger than the music happening.
Despite
popular opinion while I was wandering around not once did I indulge in
what was supposed to be ever so pervasive. I tell you not joint one …
nada … zilch. And to tell you the truth I couldn’t tell you if anyone
was trying to sell any acid or anything like that, I simply didn’t give
a damn. I didn’t f**king need anything. Though you might ask me “are
you sure you weren’t already tripped out?” You’re damn right I was
tripped out, and it had nothing to do with altered states of
consciousness. The fact is something beautiful was happening and I
couldn’t fully explain it, I’m not sure I can fully explain it, but I
think after so many years of being separated from it and returning
realizing what was missing, I am now able to recognize it.
I
asked a friend if she considered herself to be a part of the Woodstock
generation, she replied, “yes- i do consider myself to be of that
generation but i am not so proud of it lately. it seems the generation
that was going to change the world did-and not for the better. we have
become a self absorbed greedy-me-me-me-i want it now generation. we
have squandered a great opportunity to make the world a more generous
and loving place and sadness is the outcome.” She is right.
These
are my thoughts in reply “Yes "that generation" blew it. But I think
some of us are coming out of it - realizing our stupidity. But I can't
really hold any to blame ... there were (and are) no hard fast
absolutes that could easily be taught, and I suppose each generation
has to figure it out on their own. Maybe our biggest encumbrance was
the megalith of the system we had to deal with, and it has certainly
grown exponentially since. Yet at the same time I think some of us have
matured to a point that dying for what has become our “absolute” inner
sense of right and wrong is not such a bad thing, as there is in
actuality no such thing as death - only transformation. They can't kill
us all ... or can they? What is the nature of the battle? Are we
willing to become engaged in it (you know that I do not infer any kind
of violence). But what is the strength of our character as over and
opposed to those who would exploit everything for their own temporal
benefit?”
To be continued …