Tiff Tiff Tiff....

It's okay... I empathize with you. You are truly expressive of your concerns with your life so far and where you believe it is heading... your questions and observations are honest but a little misguided. Not knowing you but only knowing the talent you possess in that voice tells me how much potential you have in just one aspect of your life. I don't need to know you personally to guarantee that fact. As for the reality of life... yes we are all growing older since the moment we are born. No surprise there. Don't spend time thinking about something that will happen regardless. This is our path of existence. Love... true love exists but you cannot look for it. It finds you when your mind and heart least expect it... it is beyond our comprehension. Just know that it does exist... whether you have had lots of it, only a little or none at all. The purity and truthfulness of your heart will guide true love to it. It will find its way into your life. Trust in it.
 

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way Tiff. I know all about depression, trust me. I woke up January 1st feeling down as well. But 2008 can be whatever you want it to be! That's what I love about life, that just when you least expect it, it can surprise you. Maybe this year you will find a new love or a new friend or a new job... who knows, ya know? I know it's easy to obsess over the way things "used to be" but life is constantly changing and it's up to you to make your life what you want it to be. You are a beautiful, smart, funny, and amazing woman. I have every belief that you can do whatever you want in life. Hang in there love. *Hugs*
 

Keep your chin up! Think of 2008 as a new beginning, new challenges, new laughs, and new discoveries. Getting older doesn't mean uglier, it means more mature and seasoned. It will be harder to loose weight, but just add a half hour to the daily routine and you will be very surprised with the results. Successful music career, well, define success, maybe a successful pop career is going down the drain but that's never really about the music, it's about sales and marketing. Put a band together, write some tunes, perform around the city or even just post some videos to youtube. I think you'll find a whole other level of success! Love will come when you least expect it, it's there, you'll see. And please know, the best years of your life are yet to be discovered. Trust me, they really are. 2008 will be an awesome year, you'll see!! And in those moments of feeling down, know you can always call me and we can go get drunk! Hell Alcohol will always be there for those less than desirable days.
 

My darling dear.. You have so much more strength and courage within you than even you realize. This is evidence of it. Next time we're sitting down someplace, remind me to tell you the story of the pearls. Remember that better things only come when we can let go of the good things. I won't tell you to not be depressed because shoot, I am too. Loss is hard, period. But at the end of the day, the only way you ever really lose is when you decide to stop moving forward. And you haven't done that yet.

{{{{{GIANT HUGS!!!}}}}}
 

it's a fact that women become more secure as we age - they say that the 20s are riddled with insecurities, once you reach your 30s you are more secure, and by your 40s your insecurities all but disappear. i find it exciting, this getting older thing. we keep getting wiser and getting better at things, and we really do mature and stop acting like dumb little girls.

as for older age reducing the chances of true love or music careers, i wholeheartedly disagree. when we are young we are more likely to date assholes (ahem, lol) and end up rushing into marriages and unstable things like that, but when you get older you pick more wisely, know what you are looking for in a mate, and besides - the chances of finding true love never decrease. ever. people find true love in their 90s. and the music thing - well, you know many famous musicians who were discovered older than you.

as for looks, think of it this way - if at our age now they have botox and boob jobs available, only imagine what they will have available in 20 or 30 years... maybe something better than botox and some way to make your boobs look young again without implants (reshaping? lol.) you don't have nasty wrinkly skin yet, and your boobs are still supple and firm, so try not to prematurely worry. right now you look young, not old, to state the obvious.

the main issue is are you being proactive in shaping your life the way you want it to be? are you pursuing music yourself? do you have a music plan, like setting aside money to record a demo and send it off to record companies, for instance? and are you following the diet rules we came up with a couple of weeks ago to help you lose weight? if you are proactive, then when you are 40 you will be more successful, wealthier, more attractive and thin than you are now, and you'll be in love and feel secure with yourself. your statement saying you are "powerless to stop it" is far from the truth, honey!!!!!!!

you say you're obsessing about the past, but the past wasn't so great, it's only an illusion. sure there were great moments in the pass we all think back on fondly. but there will be even greater moments in the future.

hope i gave you some food for thought, and we can talk more later. i'm always here for you, you know that bb. mwah. love you.
 

Puh-lease Tiffany. Snap out of it and quit feeling sorry for yourself. I like you too much to get sucked into your self-absorbed self-pity. Besides, can you even hear what you're saying?


*Happy getting older and uglier?
I myself just turned 41. I guess that makes me truly hideous. Apparently, I have no game now.

*Happy metabolism slowing down and making it harder to lose weight?
I now sleep in a bed made from the crate a grand piano was shipped in.

*Happy chances of ever having a successful music career going down the drain as each day goes by?
Just like everything else you gotta keep plugging at it. And even if it never happens you still have to keep plugging at *you*. Either that or just give up -- your choice.

*Happy chances of finding true love dwindling down and down to nothingness?
You have to BE the person you want to attract ... would YOU want to go out with someone constantly depressed living in a black hole? I don't think so. Not very attractive, is it? And if you're truly depressed it's not going away by itself -- you need to take responsibility for your own health, both mental and physical.

*Happy best-years-of-my-life disappearing more quickly than I ever thought they would?
You're right. My best years left me long ago. At 41 years old my life is completely over, useless, and definitely not worth living. I should just fucking kill myself now and spare my friends the agony of observing my pathetic middle age.

Again, snap out of it! Grow some balls! See a therapist! Whatever it takes. It's obvious I nor any of your friends can convince you you are worthwhile, special, unique and worth knowing ... perhaps a shrink can. ;)