Last week I asked you to send in your questions to soul tinged acoustic behemoth James Morrison (remember?). James has very kindly offered to answer the best ones, so perhaps if you concentrate for just 1 minute you might learn something…

Dear James,

Firstly I must say congratulations on winning Best British Male at last week's Brit Awards. You are definitely more talented than Jarvis Cocker. Anyway I was recently having an argument with my brother and wondered if you could settle the following question. It is a well known fact that Henry VIII had more wives than Robbie Williams, but can you tell me which of the 2 has won the most Brit Awards?

Tariq, Bolton

 James says: "Thanks ever so much for your kind words. I definitely deserved to win a Brit Award, though it still hasn't sunken in yet. To answer your question Robbie Williams has won an incredible 15 Brit Awards while Henry VIII despite composing 'Greenseleeves' hasn't scooped a single trophy. I once got told by a friend Anne of Cleeves won a Brit Award, but apparently he meant Annie Lennox."

Dear James,

Well done on your Brit Award James, I was rooting for either you or Paolo Nutini. My question is: I was recently walking down Orpington high street, and I thought I saw what appeared to be a 'mirage'. However unlike most 'mirages' as I got closer it did not disappear. Were my eyes playing tricks on me or could this be true?

Melanie, Orpington

 James says: "Hey Melanie, I'm totally made up about winning my first Brit, and I think I probably deserved it more than Paolo, simply because I am the singer songwriter on everyone's lips at the moment. What you were seeing was actually a Mirage, believe it or not! There happens to be a popular café on Orpington High Street called Mirage and this is almost certainly what your eyes witnessed. If you approach Mirage from the St Mary's Cray end of the High Street then the café is visible from up to 200 metres away…confusing huh?!"

Dear James,

I'm so pleased you came away with a Best British Male Brit Award, though I do also think Jamelia was robbed. Anyway my question to you is why do crabs walk sideways? My mate reckons it is something to do with magnets.

Reuben, Birmingham

James says: "Hi Reuben, it's been an incredible year! If someone said to me 12 months ago while I was busking in Cornwall that I'd go on to win a Brit Award, then I would have spat in their face. I agree about Jamelia, perhaps the police should take the award off Amy Winehouse and give it to Jamelia! 

  To answer your question I have to say that your friend is incorrect. Magnets do have very little effect on crabs. The reason they walk sideways is quite simply because they are the 'jokers' of the crustacean family, and are always up for a laugh. It is a well known fact that if crabs are on their own and have no one to share a visual joke with, then they will simply walk normally. It has also been known for limpets to heckle crabs because of their funny walks, yet like so much in the animal kingdom, the heckling takes place at too high a frequency for the human ear to notice."

Dear James,

Can you help settle a pub discussion me and my pal Wendy had last week. Wendy reckons a snooker table is bigger than a football pitch, but I'm sure it's the other way round. Since she's so adamant about the matter, it has started to put some doubt into my mind. Also why is the grass on snooker tables always in such great condition?

Fred, Cowdenbeath

  James says: "Cheers for your support Fred! I couldn't win Brit Awards if it wasn't for people like you. I am fairly sure that a snooker table is less than half the size of a football pitch, so you are indeed correct Fred. Though I do believe if you see a snooker table on the television it is not actual size. I'm afraid I can't help you on the snooker table grass question, that's got me totally stumped."

Dear James,

I wrote to you earlier saying that Jamelia was robbed. This did not relate to the Brit Awards, but in fact I found her crying next to her unlocked backdoor earlier this morning. I do however have another question that has been troubling me for sometime. Does the film Romeo Must Die starring Aaliyah count as an 'urban myth'?

Reuben (Jamelia's dad), Birmingham

 James says: "Sorry to hear about Jamelia. It is a shame she doesn't have a Brit Award to comfort her. You do raise an excellent question Reuben, and I believe Romeo Must Die is indeed an urban myth. I also believe the 2002 film 'Queen of the Damned' starring Aaliyah is also an urban myth, due to it starring a popular R&B singer, and being all about vampires."

Dear James,

My mate tells me that the Titanic sank. I keep telling him that it can't have sank because it was unsinkable. Is he having me on?

Wolfy, Quantock Hills

 James says: "Hopefully I'll make it a Brit Award double next year Wolfy!

I'm afraid your mate isn't having you on, the Titanic really did sink. Perhaps the ultimate irony is that loads of little boats (called lifeboats) didn't sink, despite being small, rubbish and made of wood. There was a multi Oscar winning film about the Titanic, called Deep Impact which you might like to see to learn more about the subject."

If you have any further questions for James, don't hesitate to ask. He is a very clever man. I'm off to have tea and scones with Winehouse. Bye! x