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Current mood:  mellow
distracted earlier over coffee
the uncontrolled physical presence, a convulse of body memory.
nerve and pumping drum.
i already know that tonight, sometime after twilight, i will be watching the sky
and feeling lighter, release.
but the words for june, from the voluptuary of days
numbered 13-30, when they are not blinked back
are words like
lugubrious
the lugging of water weight in pails
the full b of it for bosom
the balloon of underneath deep in breath
slow out
and the things that appear, even still
i am a drifting ship,a dreamer and a floater
my anchor arms wrought
iron
my heart has questions for faiths
and i don't follow an interventionist godhead
but crooked---this experience
with proliferation of signs
too loud, obvious and often
tells me there is a something
even if only e=mc2
even if only our noticing
even if it doesn't offer karmic solace in the right spaces
and does nothing for the abyss
of her missing voice
and no new knowledge.
my furniture is forever rearranged
as it is after any maelstrom of person
fills in a letter of team, of familiar
with bluster
of breath and story.
people say i took this hard
though i would and have before
for others
the answer is an echo
how could i have taken it any other way?
~~~~
i have something brewing, steeping about the last days,
the weirdness of celebrity deaths & then those that are
celebrities to us personally.
right now, it's just stream of consciousness,
a bit of random and nonsense.
in an aside, radar, poet from Van-Edmonton
landed unexpectedly for an overnight layover.
she called me right as i was reading a poem about vancouver
by logan phillips in a synchronicity i love
& so we had a few extra hours other than the night
we figured for a few weeks from now. it was good to hear her
& hang out on the java patio. she said something about retiring
hip-hop poems, and i smiled, reminiscent of another pretty throated
girl who said the same thing.
see, this is how it is now.this, paired with dreams of crime scenes & mysteries,
insomnia, reminders, days tagged by i-pod random shuffle,
sensations of lovely, sea & winged creatures purchasing attention.
missing.still feeling,
anyway.movement & shift.
 | Currently listening:
I Am a Bird Now
By Antony and the Johnsons
Release date: 2005-02-01 |
|
8:20 PM
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