GAS FOR LESS rehearsals are under way. The cast consists of five men. I am by far the least experienced and also the only non-equity actor in the show. Translation: MAJOR LEARNING OPPORTUNITY. Some of these actors have been at it since before I was born, and they are rocking it. The show is going to be amazing.

From watching these actors at work, and also thinking about other times when I've worked with veteran actors, I've made a few valuable observations:

1) They are actors all the time. It is what they do, who they are, how they are. I don't get the sense that they are "acting", they look like they are "playing" in the true sense of the word.

2) They are always ready. It's not like they come in 30 minutes early, warm up their bodies, warm up their voices, "take in the room", etc. They come in ready and they leave ready. And I bet if you stopped one of them in the middle of lunch and asked them to perform they would be ready.

3) They bring a lot of themselves and their personalities to their roles. This is a big one for me. I've always thought of acting as some kind of magical transformation. You "become" a character very different from yourself. And the more different the character seems from you, the better actor you are. Right?

But when you are acting it is the words you speak and the actions you take and the circumstances you find yourself in that make your character different from you. Not some vague, magical cloak of "becoming". I talk to these guys and then I see them rehearse and the transition is seamless. They aren't "putting on" a character. They are playing. And of course there are layers to it that make the character stand out--dialects, movement patterns, speech patterns. But much of this is just a matter of following the words and actions in the script.

I often worry that when I play a role I'm just playing it as myself. You know, that I'm not really stretching myself or using any range...I'm just being me. But the sense I get from watching some of these actors is that they have grown into very expansive, expressive human beings. It shows in how aware they are, how animated and fun they are. In their voices and in their bodies. That's what I really meant in observation 1. So when they are on stage it's just a matter of channeling that amazing energy, utilizing that expansive understanding--not shutting it off (which is usually what we do if we think we're being judged).

Of course you will bring your own unique flavor to every role you play. That's what they want. Your understanding, your experience, your style, FULLY MANIFESTED in the role.
In school we were taught that there's a difference between "bringing a role to yourself" and "bringing yourself to a role". The idea being that we shouldn't be placing our limitations on the role, rather we should be expanding ourselves to meet the requirements of the role. I think I projected some of my own doubts (about myself and my abilities) onto that simple concept and confused it. Now I get it. And the underlying reality is this: There's no difference between the two. You are the role, the role is you.

*In essence, what I've noticed in a lot of veteran actors is a simplicity that seems to come with confidence. Actors that are playing their parts, not actors trying to prove they are good enough. It only make sense. You can't play a role authentically if your attention is divided.

This will be a challenge for me in "Gas For Less" because of course I really want to prove that I belong at the Goodman. It's my first time on such a stage, and I want it to be the first of many . . . so I am very aware that this is a big step for me and I want to make the most of it. But that will take care of itself if I play the role. I must remember that I DO belong here and then act like it.