Dallas, TX
February 16, 2006
Night

Josh the Devil and the Sinners' carriage careens to a stop on the sidewalk in front of the legendary Bar of Soap. Inside, the first person we meet is a man who introduces himself as Crazy. "C-R-A-Z-Y," he says. We don't argue. Two large bulldogs roam the premises. They would spill no blood this night.

We eat a hearty meal of delicious fried things at a restaurant situated down the street from a dinosaur. A tyrannosaurus rex, I believe. The t-rex could just have easily made a meal of us, but perhaps he knew there was a greater purpose behind our visit. Later, he would feast upon vegetarians and afficianados of techo music. They are part of the great circle of life now, weep not.

Back at the club, we find that the man behind the bar will trade us wonderful liquids for the beautiful slivers of crimson paper we possess. While it is difficult, at first, to divest ourselves of our tiny works of art, we soon find that it is a more than worthwhile endeavor. The liquids give all who ingest them feelings of goodwill and a desire for powerful music. The persons who have come to witness tonight's blessed event are many. They congregate amongst the clothes-washing devices and moving-picture games. Handsome men; women in frocks that bare the cleave of their bosom; lovely women of the state of Washington and Zimbabwe; persons with paintings carved into their flesh; all were there. All would learn.

The men who are called the Susans materialize on the stage, producing a pleasing sound for an undetermined period of time. Perhaps it still goes on, in the ether.

The time finally arrives for Josh the Devil and the Sinners to open the conduit between their world and the world of mortal man. Tales of hot-rod vans, tractor pulls, men-of-outer-space and death pour forth, drenching the attendees, whipping them into a frenzied, dervish-like state. For more than an hour, it continues. Finally, with all on the verge of physical and mental collapse, it comes to a glorious end. Josh the Devil and the Sinners have delivered their benediction. They have transformed lives. Given purpose to the aimless; blinded the lepers; slain the living and raised the dead, only to slay them again, for such is their will.

Josh the Devil and the Sinners would eventually take their leave of the throng, seeking refuge in an inn in the town of the Garlands. As the morning sun rose, Josh the Devil and the Sinners would begin the treacherous journey back to Akron, Ohio. Along the way, dragons were assaulted and gnomes of the earth kicked in the head. Some things were set afire. This is the way of Josh the Devil and the Sinners. And it is good.