Ladies & Gentlemen,

I've got something to say.  As some of you may know, July 1st is a very special day.  It's a day, where lumberjacks feel that extra pride in their axe swinging duties.  It's a day, where hockey players think about past glories and future conquests.  It's a day, where beavers and moose get along and drink beer together.  Women wrap the red and white Canadian flag around their bodies as if it were a strapless top.  Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, people of different ages, races, and spaces....IT'S CANADA DAY!  Happy Canada Day to you and your family!  Please have a cold one for me folks...I'll be stuck in a car for 12 hours!