Well, that feeling I'm oh so familar with is coming back to me. The one I felt in middle school, where I stopped giving a shit about anything, and felt like I had nothing going for me. Except this time, the consequences are a lot bigger, and hit more people.

The main culprit? Money. I owe EVERYONE money. College sucked it out of me, and my parents were very kind in helping me pay. However, I couldn't deal with all the stress and left for a while. Now, all of the loans I got from various organizations are asking for their money back, and my dad wants his $10,000 back. This, my friends, is the very reason I left in the first place. Stress over money.

Why is college so god damn expensive? How is this system expected to fucking work? I want to go back, but now I'm extremely fucked. Once I get my car paid off (which is actually pretty close to being done), now I have to focus on paying back my dad a shitload of money, and then the loans for school. I feel like I'm working for nothing now. If I go back now, I have to pay for it all by myself. I'd have to work full time every single day, then take night classes or something. And even that wouldn't cover the costs. I'd still have to take out more loans to be able to have any time left for homework and a social life. I hate loans. I hate doing stuff when I know I'm building up monsterous amounts of debt.

I feel like shit. I don't even feel like going to sleep now. As soon as I wake up I have to go to work, to pay back everyone. What a waste. Fuck this shit.