Who wants to read a blog written by a girl with tonsellitis. Not the most attractive sounding thing is it. Now comes the assumption I'm just writing because I have nothing else to do with myself.

No, I'm writing because I've had not much else to do but simply think. I've learnt something. This is nothing. This small tiny spec of insignificance. Why haven't I been sick until now? Why haven't I been sicker? Not why am I sick, WHY AREN'T I SICKER?? I'm stressing about missing a week of school. People miss much more than that. People have permanent illness. Constant pain. Constant. Why don't I have that?

People don't notice when someone is really healthy.

They notice when they're really sick. Take some notice. Health means control. You can stop the things that cause you pain, you can stop what you're doing, and change to something else. You can live anywhere. You can take any job you want. Study anything. Have endless options. You can dance, run, swim, FROLLICK.

I did this to myself. No sleep, no warmth, alcohol, dehydration, caffeine overload, shit food, caring too much about shit that doesn't matter and letting it drain me. No wonder I got fucking sick.

I know there is something else that is changing the way I think. Not just being in pain. Something else. You haven't been happy until you've found it. I think I have. I think I'm there. Count my smiles.