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"Steven motherfuckin' Reed"

Steve Reed


Last Updated: 12/8/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: In a Relationship
Age: 18
Sign: Capricorn

City: FOSTORIA
State: Washington DC
Country: US
Signup Date: 3/11/2006
Friday, September 11, 2009 
Once again, left in the dust on a trail of broken dreams. Holding onto the dust that once was our true Love. Taking in the air, the same air you breath as I long to give you the life I once have. I dream and fall to the path. I am buried there. In my sorrow, my Love and my dreams.

You are my hero, my shining star that lights my way home. Do not fade away. I'll never get back. I'll never be safe. I need your hand to dream.

I am away from Temptation, and I'm onto the point of pure necessity. I'm to the end where I can't walk onward without you. I fall. I am empty. I have nothing unless I have your heart and your hand in mine. Meaningless existence is defined only by the absence of you.

And I wait in the darkness, the shadow of a doubt, for your Love. The glow of your eyes equals my salvation. My life giver. My chance to go on.

I have been hurt, but never conquered. I shall never be conquered for I am who you made me. I am strong through my suffering. Like a muscle, repair me and make me stronger than I ever have, with every fiber of my being. Heal my broken heart, help it
to become stronger than all rage and anger.

This room I have encountered on the path is padded and secure. But I am a prisoner in my own mind. The thought of not having you is like putting a rabid beast in the room with me. We will decimate each other until there is nothing left. Not having you creates restlessness in my conscience. And the room grows smaller. The beast gets closer. It's breath on my neck like the thoughts of you still lingering in my head. Save me. Save me from this monster. Save me from this beast. I cannot conquer myself.

I break from the room with a few saving words. Words that guide me, but into a different direction. I break from the chains, at least for now, heading in the opposite direction.

I feel I have lost my North Star.

I get lost in the trees, the many people who tell me which path I should take. Each one, as I walk through, whipping me painfully with their branches. As I turn around to see you again, they lacerate my eyes and the vision of you becomes obscure. I fall once again.

The trees taunt me. Laughing at my failure. I need to move on. I need to get away, they say. The more I look back, the more I get hurt. But what is exactly hurting me?
I break through the brush and encounter an open field. I witness millions of stars. None of which is mine. They call to my heart, follow me. I will lead you home. And each star I follow, leads me further from you.

Sorrow takes control of me as I feel I will never be home again. The wind blows. And I hear my name. Your voice is the wind, blowing into the direction. It takes time for me to understand where I am to go and what to follow. The grass blows in the same direction. I fall to my knees and ask the One who I feel turned His back on me. He commands an overwhelming breeze that dries my tears and leads me.

I stand.

Miles away, I know you are, but there is no distance between you and my heart.

I walk onward. Strong as I have before. The sun begins to rise and it is a new day. I have lived once more.

With the dreams still holding true,
I am the UnConquered.