i feel like a fool.

i feel like a cheater.

i know that these feelings are not so cool.

i've used my self,

as a tool.

i've hidden my pain behind a ficticios mask.

i changed my name,

got the make-up and the mirror...

told the world who i wasn't.

and made a game out of life...

but now i am here

ajusting to the truth.

the real game,

the real stuggle...

my names have been many,

pk,

markallyn,

howlettzn

and

kid

but now i must say that they all mean the same

i cant remain to societies labels

trapped in this maze,

you can solve the math how ever you like,

but no matter how many ways,

the answers all ways the same..

the same idiotic bite of irony in the ass...

watch us all take the venom...

watch us all die,

its inevitable...

so for now i'll laugh,

for now i'll love...

but further more i'll learn.

to never be like you...

for there you are.

and i am here...

i can not,

be you...

i'll live on to tell the tales

the fun i had...

and never regret the memories,

the ones that hurt but can not break me,

but most of all,,,

i need to say sorry...

for the lies,

the cries,

and most of all my crazy ass...

i said it once,

i'll say it again,

with out you,

or anyone else

 i am one,

i make my choices,

they might confuse you,

but the choices are only for me,

i never know what they do to them,

but now i see, 

i've opened my eyes.

the lights blinded me for a moment...

so if you can read this....

im sorry.

i made people disposable,

i made people not have feelings,

but that was in my world,

a very dark, disfunctional delusion.

this new world of many,

is so much brighter!

i feel so new.

and i want you to know.

i lost nothing,

because i found it all,

my soul, my heart, my mind and body,

i am one...

with many,

i dont need me

to survive,

i need everyone,

to survive me,

and to know my apology,