25 Things About Me that you may not know... (yeah, why not)

Apparently I'm supposed to tag people with the idea of making them do it too, but I say - look, we all don't have an infinite amount of time to do these sorts of things, but why not. It's fun.


1. -- I was born on my Grandmother's birthday.

2. -- My mother's funeral service was scheduled for my 21st Birthday, but when I realized that it was to be my 21st Birthday - I canceled the funeral and moved it to the following day, so that for the rest of my life, I wouldn't have my mother's death be tied to birthday. Just felt like it was wrong as hell. BTW - she died in a fire.

3. -- I went to college with the express intention to get a Law degree, graduate, open a Law practice in my maternal Grandfather's law office which I own, then run for Texas Congress from Baylor County and then after much handshaking and a few backroom BJs, President of the United States. Seriously. I had it all mapped out. I took one Film Appreciation class, met a girl. She loved the way I talked about movies. There was hanky panky and I realized... F' politics, I give great movie chat. That was at age 17.

4. -- I am an Eagle Scout. Not only that, but 4th Generation 1st Born Eagle Scout. And yes, I'm extremely proud of that honor - and still wear an Eagle pin on my 3/4s length slicker. If I have a son, I hope he'll get into Scouting, as it is a tradition I hope continues.

5. -- I lost my virginity at 15, over 11 months before my wife was born. Just one of the many odd realizations that I had prior to marrying Patricia, which caused her to shake her head and think I'm a really really sick puppy. Good thing she loves puppies... even old broken ones like me.

6. -- I was the first U.S. Boy to officially visit the Soviet Embassy, where I was representing this Future Leaders Of America group that I was somehow chosen for. I met with the Soviet Ambassador and wound up with a letter recommending a scholarship to MOSCOW STATE UNIVERSITY, where I planned to major in Film History - as I read that the Soviets had an immense uncatelogued film library at MSU, that I dreamt of working my way through. I was accepted and offered a full scholarship. My mother refused to let me go to THEN COMMUNIST SOVIET UNION... 3 months after I turned down the scholarship - The wall fell and the turning page of history flipped and I was heartbroken that I wasn't there to see it.

7. -- I can operate a tractor, bulldozer, catepillar, bobcat - as well as take apart a lawnmower engine and even built from scratch a trailer that was inspected and approved to haul 1500lb loads.

8. -- I lived on a ranch. Woke up and milked a cow. Hauled hay. Shoveled horse shit, chicken shit, pig shit & goat shit. Road horseback rounding up cattle, as well as helping my mother train cutting horses. My hair was an inch over my ear and I wore 100% western fashions.

9. -- I know, by heart, 7 Barbara Mandrel songs and a number of 1984-1989 Western songs, which I sung duet style on Bus #2 every morning on an hour and 20 minute school bus ride to school.

10. -- Total Band Geek. Played Tenor Saxophone and Trombone. Dreamt of being a part of the Longhorn band and still remember how they marked time.

11. -- I can still play CHARIOTS OF FIRE, MR ROBOTO and the theme to E.T. on piano. Well, pieces of them. I used to be able to play from memory all of Survivor's EYE OF THE TIGER, as I thought it made me seem badass and a stud. I actually never played it for a girl, as once I got to girl impressing age, I realized (I thought) that playing the piano would make me seem gay. (You have to understand, I was in North Texas and many such comments at the time)

12. -- An Elementary School pointillism painting I did of the Riddler stealing the Batmobile was chosen and hung for some time in the Beijing Children's Museum in China.

13. -- I once slept in a grass hut in a Mayan village outside of Palenque, as it was first being cleared for a week - often waking up to a havelina boar named Petunia Pig that liked to nestle with me on the floor of the open air hut.

14. -- After my parents divorced, and I moved to Baylor County... for a short period of time, my mother dated the head of the KKK in Baylor County. Since my best friends were of various ethnic backgrounds, I was, of course, horrified. And having come from the Liberal Utopia of Texas (AUSTIN) - I was bound and determined to end this horrid relationship. I sold the racist bastard the prize 4H Thanksgiving Turkey. Delivered it stuffed with a hundred BLACK CAT Firecrackers lit on his doorstep and watched as it Exploded as he opened his door. Shortly after. He and my mother broke up.

15. -- I own George Pal's Director Chair that he used throughout his years directing and producing. It is embossed leather with Gold encrusted stamped letters in the back - and came with his Script bag, which hung from the chair and held his scripts. I am... a huge George Pal freak.

16. -- I collect Ruby Crystal glassware from the 20s & 30s. I have a significant collection.

17. -- I was a Falconer's assistant. Among the bird's I helped him train and show at the Texas Renaissance Faire outside Magnolia, Texas - were: A Golden Eagle, a raven, a red-tailed falcon and a great horned owl. My most amazing memory was holding that Golden Eagle upon my gloved hand with it's wings beating - easily double my height in width it seemed. The Raven was the most amazing trained bird I worked with.

18. -- Also at the Renaissance Faire, I worked for a couple of years as part of Carol Shannon's Belly Dancing Troupe. From ages 7-9 I worked for a percentage of their tips first in their dressing room, where I thankfully saw much nudity (The seventies were such a great period) - and later helped with the act, where I would bring the sword out to Carol, who would place it upon my head after I knelt down upon a knee. She would then shake her glittery cleavage on either side of my head and crash her finger cymbals musically. She smelled of lavender. I like boobies.

19. -- At Age 9 - 12, I worked with Merlin the Magician at the Texas Renaissance Faire. His real name was Bill Palmer - and I was completely integrated into his act - and dreamt of becoming an actor. I know how many of the most amazing magic tricks are done. And I've never told a soul.

20. -- For a period of time my senior year, I considered becoming a Band Director for a High School, because I really loved band that much... especially working with this really nifty program to design marching band marches with music. I specifically remember working with Mr Driskill on his computer helping to design our march for our performance of TOTO's AFRICA. It was... beautiful.

21. -- In High School, I ran and campaigned for BIGGEST BOOKWORM... and won!

22. -- The first girl I ever loved was the daughter of a Jeweler at the Texas Renaissance Faire, whose father designed Merlin's skull cap and staff in the movie EXCALIBUR. Her name was Ty or TIE or something like that. She made me a Stained Glass window with a flower in it. I still have it. We skinny dipped in the Renn Fest's pond. I wound up with some sort of ear infection, that came back every year for the following 12 years. And as a result I have a slight bit of hearing loss in my left ear.

23. -- I have saved both of my parent's lives on separate occassions. My father was choking to death and was laying on his back turning blue. I was 7 years old. I took my Nerf Rocket Launcher tube and air pump, and stuck the tube down his throat pumping oxygen back into his lungs, until an adult showed up to heimleich the obstruction from his throat. My mother - was my Senior year of high school. She was incredibly inebriated and fell into a swimming pool fully clothed. My sister, a very little girl, came running into the hotel room in Wichita Falls that we were staying in, and told me something was wrong with mom. By the time I got there, she was on the bottom of the pool and had stopped moving. I dove in, pulled her out, administered CPR, for which I'm fully trained (BOY SCOUT) - and brought her back. I carried her back into our room and nursed her back to health. She didn't want to go to the hospital (yes, she was kinda crazy)

24. -- I attended the first screening of GOLDEN VOYAGE OF SINBAD - and watched the entire screening sitting upon Ray Bradbury's lap.

25. -- I am an excellent cook.