Ever drop a glass into the sink while cleaning it?
I hadn’t either. (Nor, when I called for advice, had my parents, in-laws, brothers-in-law.) 9:30 pm is NOT the time to figure this out on your own, but I didn’t have a choice.
1 - NEVER let a large glass bowl slip from your hands when washing dishes.
2 - If you neglected to follow step one, launch into a long rendition of all the colorful words you can think of. Repeat as needed.
3 - Check the counter and floor for glass pieces.
4 - Grab a thick rag to retrieve all the glass you can from the sink. You can pick them up with your bare hands, but glass splinters are guaranteed and then you’ll really have a good reason for spewing enthusiastic swearing noises.
5 - Glass will fall down the drain. Swearing spectacularly will not change this.
6 - Grab a flashlight and tongs. Shine the light down the drain. Sometimes you’ll have to “go for the grab” blind.
7 - Be patient. Smaller pieces can take several tries to snag. It helps if you think of it as a game of skill.
8 - Shine the light around the rim of the garbage disposal. Move any glass from the rim so it’s closer to the center. Trust me, the tongs aren’t long enough to reach the edge while they are open. The (obscene word) rim of the (vulgar word) drain blocks them.
9 - When you can’t see any more glass in the disposal, place a large plastic bowl, or microwave cover, over the drain. (This will keep any glass from flying up and into your face and eyes.)
10 - If you have a nozzle at the end of a hose, tuck it under one end of the bowl/cover.
11 - Take a deep breath, run water down the drain, and turn on the garbage disposal.
12 - If you hear grinding, stop and see if you can spot the glass. Chances are, it’s too far down, but the disposal should clear it out.
13 - Wipe the entire counter and sink area with a wet paper towel. Those little bits of (string of smoking oaths) glass hide.
14 - Vacuum the floor and any area you walked on really well.
15 - Pour yourself a drink or two. Use a plastic cup.