"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." (1 John 4:18) This verse kept going through my head as I travelled to and from West Virginia last Thursday. Along with it, thoughts of how not everything goes as planned, or as wanted, or as expected. This is nerve-shatteringly obvious sometimes.
Yet, my response should be shaped and encouraged by this verse. For, I know that God loves me perfectly and without condition or pretense or selfish desire. If this is so, and if He has this plan for my life (which I believe He does—see Jeremiah 29:11, for example), then whatever that plan might entail, I should not be afraid of the overall result. I know it will be for my good. Which is far different from saying that it will be good or easy; it might be very difficult and painful. But, I know that God is good and that He knows what He's doing better than I even know what I'm doing (which I often don't). So, I should trust without fear.
It's hard, but it's such a release when I can bring myself to die to my want to know how everything will turn out and to just remember that, as Father Arseny said, "God's ways are inscrutable and His mercy is inexhaustible." He has everything I need to make it through: the knowledge of where He wants me to go and the strength to help me get there, no matter what happens.
This song speaks to this point, and even beyond it. It's among what I typically call "scary prayers." That your world come apart if it needs to and that you will not have any of your strength to rely on when it happens is a pretty scary thing to ask. I mean…what if it really happened that way? What do you do then? The answer is far easier said than done. I know very well.
Yet, if I want God's love to be realized more and more in my life, informing and guiding every step and thought and action and decision and so on, then these things that I build have to come crashing down. They're nothing in the end but monuments to my pride and my righteous view of myself. They are distractions, they are idols, they are rubbish. Though I like them (else I wouldn't have them) they have nothing for me.
Still, this is such a hard thing to chase after and desire. It brings to mind a very fearsome scenario.
But, may it be as it should.
—
"Let Your Love Be Strong"
words by Jonathan Foreman
In this world of news, I've found nothing new
I've found nothing pure
Maybe I'm just idealistic to assume that truth
Could be fact and form
That love could be a verb
Maybe I'm just a little misinformed
As the dead moon rises, and the freeways sigh
Let the trains watch over the tides and the mist
Spinning circles in our skies tonight
Let the trucks roll in from Los Angeles
Maybe our stars are unanimously tired
Let your love be strong, and I don't care what goes down
Let your love be strong enough to weather through the thunder cloud
Fury and thunder clap like stealing the fire from your eyes
All of my world hanging on your love
Let the wars begin, let my strength wear thin
Let my fingers crack, let my world fall apart
Train the monkeys on my back to fight
Let it start tonight
When my world explodes, when my stars touch the ground
Falling down like broken satellites
Let your love be strong, and I don't care what goes down
Let your love be strong enough to weather through the thunder cloud
Fury and thunder clap like stealing the fire from your eyes
All of my world hanging on…
All of my world resting on your love