'Round the House:

marvels at the reason why
sometime that evening
in the midst of comb & gown
& brushing teeth.

gentle as her gestures
go thoughts over days past,
& the love,
somewhere a deed in the past,
you can just sense that she closes down.

sun's down, but the heat's still here.
Meanwhile the rituals & the falling
in silence, in faith.
How to be reached?

to be so discretely down.
she is a dame
mist 'round the house,
hangs among the trees.
crawls in the windows
and puts her to bed.

sometimes, but it's rarely though,
she gives a look as clear as day.
Nothing you said,
nothing you did.

she says 'so long!'
and now she wanders...

to be so discretely down.

------------------------------------------

I said, "little LiLo,
make your way,
into a little girl's heart"

a fat girl
leaves
shows her ass to
both sides of the room
solid & firm

I get such a longing
for real flesh
& much of it
& happiness,
when I watch those
tiny teens
their sickening
routines

makes my pen itch
for a script
" already half-way there
soon as the choice is made",
I tell myself.

take her flesh
& don't let it dissolve
in postmodernism.

-----------------------------------------

I don't want
mayonaise and
butter
that's as gross
as your smurk
little smurky-man

with your shiny fly-bag/suitcase crappy look

and now I think of our hands
lost in play.
one of his
& one of mine
But sometimes we cheat
& use two...

I think of that
place, halfway his
thumb, that appeared
when we were thumb-fighting

it's all this 'love-letter'
gamble type mentality
Once again I find
myself lost in space.
In between focus-points.

----------------------------------------

it's kind of greyish,
boring brown
here. industrial, perhaps.

a windmill

brown stone,
big rock hill
with trees

& yellow grass
& snow

come forward
little red houses
with white ribbon
edges
& pancakes in the morning
little ones & big ones.

Pancakes in the morning
& I think you are right.
let's rewind and play it back again
you think about him all the time

yes, you guessed right,
I'm on the road again.
next to me
two drunken russians
before me
youngsters in love
doing what I did
just hours ago,
though I left alone,
not with him.

------------------------------------------

ain't got
a leg
to stand on

no consolidation

oe,
leave me blueness
go sit in your cave.

leave me red wine
I don't need your drops
tricklin' through my happiness,
draggin' it down
into
that
blue.

-----------------------------------------

he says: " it's always like that"
(says:)
" don't fear what
you've just uncovered"

------------------------------------------

You don't know your strength
loveable & all
you took me apart
put it in the heart

way down below
can't be seen or heard
'n oh, there I stood
startled,
with a loss of love.

now it hits the ground
I'm weary of the truth
slow in understanding
much too overrated.

I put back the walls
doubled my defense
but some things've changed
surely
things are changing fast.

You don't know your strength
loveable & all
you took me apart
put it in the heart

------------------------------------------

It's a molding cellar
with a sheep's head in the fridge
I can barely see the fish in the black water.
tell me, how long is this gonna last?

what if he pins me in a corner?
what could I do??
tear all the anarchist
propaganda off the walls,
scream,
and no one would notice,
no one would hear.

I'm fed up with free-thinking
I need a home and a boyfriend,
someone whom I love and loves me back.

------------------------------------------------------

a bright omen
obvious and treacherous
we've been told
" anything too shiny
and anything too true
oh, ain't no good for you"

by the way,
if I were to let some air
fill up that dead...
spot there
let it breathe
then fill it - shut

to the lid
purple
vacuum
cleaner.

since there was no food in
that day
we went 'round the corner
to indulge in some
serious sushi-eating

every now and then
he would be provided with
a problem

how should I know
what to wish for?
what might bring me good?

or bad, for that matter;
there's some that seem to
see through life's pretentions
nail it down
and drink their cup
no further than 'till ---

since there's nothing else to do,
she get's back to bed.
he receives her
with modest desire
gentle demands and
warm thrusts.

---------------------------------------------------