What a weird summer it's been. In the past four months (save the late night food excursions of the past few weeks...) I've lost a ton of weight, gotten on a straighter head than I've had in years and, in the process, have had a grand time re-establishing relationships with two great friends from long ago, and have not once minded being asked to kick in my weight in the goings-on around here.

In short, it has been a living-indoors kinda blast; and, if I had it to do all over again, I'd happily and easily have focused more on the many and varied good times than the few bad stretches (mostly due to a lack of cigarettes...)

But now summer is almost over; and while it might seem arbitrary, I now wonder how much longer my days in (actually, out of) the sun might last.

Times change; and the first thing to go in any shift in eras are those items seen as novelties. What seemed workable in June might stink like Ben Franklin's notion of visitors and fish come September.One minute, Herman's Hermits are topping the charts; and the next, Peter Noone wakes up in a haze in L.A., fronting a band called The Tremblers, just to pay the rent.

Hopefully, this won't be the case here; but, even if not, I already seem to have lost/shooed away the most important person/thing ever in my life this summer of mixed blessings-- and now,barring some sort of Gibson-esque last second miracle, I have to live with that, forever....

The lesson here is simple; and though I was far too caught up in my own shit over the last 4 or 5 years to see it as the only truth, to the point where, now, there's nothing left to be done-- it doesn't mean some sad bastard out there can't profit from my most ultimate of fuckups...

Needing to be "right" in any and every argument, and "needing" to push your point across, no matter the cost, just ain't fucking worth it! All it leads to is sheer misery-- especially if you actually love said person, and he or she hasn't gone behind your back and fucked anyone else.

In short, everything short of cheat-fucking can easily be worked out.

Okay, not easily, if the other person in question is a chick, as you know how they like to blah-di-dah on and on about shit; but, still...

If you're really into it, just fucking suck it up, shut your idiot mouth, and go to sleep when the opportunity arises.

Take it up again in the morning; and, until then, just shut your idiot face and thank your lucky stars you did so before you said some heavy shit no one can ever take back.

No, I'm not saying women are right all the time; I'm just saying that, by birth, they are equally as insane and bat-shit crazy as we are-- but it doesn't mean they are always wrong.

All it means is that they A)retain the stupid shit we say and do for far longer, and will hold it against us, and B) they will always find someone better than us well before we find someone better than them....

In short, I have no idea what I am saying, other than it is better (if you love her) to just err on the side of caution, shut your mouth after a certain point, and just leave it alone.....

If not, the chances are good we'll be buried side by side...

And you don't want that....

chris