Autumn is finally here. The air seems to be turning just a bit, the leaves are changing and all that other happy seasonal crap I used to love is beginning to happen. I used to look forward to this time of year the way a fat kid looks forward to finding an overturned ice cream truck with no survivors; and while the change in weather will certainly be welcome, I'm afraid this year that fall's usual tarty charms will mostly be lost on me...

So, why not hope for a bit of a shakeup? There are no great pronouncements to be found here; not that there ever were, but there will be even less from this entry than usual. I'm just plain old sick and tired, kinda don't give a fuck about much anymore, and am quite frankly just looking for some amusement that requires little or no effort on my part.

In other words, I just wanna watch Rome burn while someone else does the fiddling. I mean, why the hell not?

Stock market goes completely to shit? Fine by me. And if the idiot government wants to spend 800 billion bucks to bail it out or 'rescue' it, well I say go right the fuck ahead! Again, why not? This idiot country continues to spend ungodly amounts of money everyday trying to ram our vision of life on Earth down everyone else's throats in wars (declared and covert), police actions, occupations, etc., etc., that at this point it really doesn't matter where they throw the next bigassed chunk of change as it is all now just Monopoly money, leveraged against whatever future may be left-- and that future, if you can call it that, is looking bleaker every second.

So, spend-- spend it all! Turn out tomorrow and tomorrow's tomorrows ad infinitum and squared to the gazillionth power and treat the future like some $3 whore to beaten with the heel of your Hush Puppies, as it has already happened even well before the likely bailout-- so why sit and wring hands over this shit any longer?! And, please, don't tell me that anything great or wonderful is gonna happen in November as long as we "embrace change"; because that's just another lil' fairytale as well. No matter who gets the election, it will be business as usual at 1600 Pennsylvania Av., because of one simple fact: For the past 100 or so years, with very few exceptions, American government has been lousy with politicians and practically void of statesmen.

There is a HUGE difference.

And that is why I've only voted once in the past 20 years and will not vote again this time. For some reason, people seem to think this is somehow irresponsible or un-American of me--as though just pulling any old lever even when you don't believe any of the shit being sold is somehow more learned or civic minded. Well, it ain't, no matter what the bloggers, pundits, friends or folksingers tell you. Why give your vote to something you don't believe in? How does THAT solve anything, or make you a more involved citizen or this a better country? Does blind malleability make for a bunch of team players, or merely another group of lemmings storming the cliffside while amped up on Mountain Dew and hypnotized by the erroneous notion that doing something, anything (even if your heart isn't in it) is better than sitting out and doing nothing? Maybe I'm just being irresponsible and politically naive here, but do you think, even just for a moment, that maybe part of the reason this country is now so fucked up is because there are no real statesmen, just politicians running things?

Where are the great orators and thinkers? Where are the great philosophers and visionaries? All I see, on both sides of the coin, are people running around trying to be as much of everything to as many blocs as they can in the hopes that someday maybe their faces will be on money or stamps-- and if you see things in a more complex and different light, please let me know. Yeah, I guess if someone stuck a gun to my head, I'd say Obama, though he isn't nearly the liberal I want him to be ,or at least doesn't have the guts to say it out loud; and if a candidate can't be EXACTLY who they are for fear of alienating voters, how will they ultimately be good to any of us, no matter our affiliations or leanings?

They can't, and they won't.

Which is why, with great trepidation, I am starting to lean toward McCain. NO, NO, NO, not because I am down with him personally or his war-mongering policies; but because at least that crazy old bastard is just senile and insane enough to go right out and pick possibly the worst and most entertaining running mate this country may have ever seen-- none other than America's favorite aging cocktail waitress, Sarah Palin.

God Bless America, I say, as finally, politics has become interesting again! Yeah, yeah, I know it is interesting for all the wrong reasons; but, who gives a rat's ass, right?! What promised to be a fairly tight race between two candidates more similar than not suddenly took a sharp turn when old Johnny boy pulled that half-drunk cougar out of his top hat-- and NONE of us could say we saw it coming! Think of it: An ex-sportscaster pups out a litter of kids while ascending from small town mayor to governor of Alaska with little qualification other than A) Alaskans must vote while drunk, blindfolded, or both, and B) makeup and public speaking tips from Courtney Love. It's like that loony, sorta whorish substitute teacher from high school hit the lottery, and when McCain dies she's gonna fly this ship, taking us all with her on some magical and lysergically nonsensical trip straight into the heart of the carnival of darkness-- and, sorry; but at this point we all may as well see how much entertainment we can get out of this sad state of affairs, both nationally and globally. The world economy, war, famine, disease, global warming, etc., etc. have set us all on some weird spin out that most like cannot be righted-- at least not setting things right the way they were prior to the onset of politicians and the near extinction of statesmen. Can't be done...

So why not spin it 180 degrees and see what actually happens when a real clown gets the keys to the car? Let's sit back and watch as the allegedly responsible politician (McCain) tries to sell his crowd on a boozy, Bible-beating ditz who calls herself "Joe six pack", knows nothing about national politics, let alone global affairs-- and just see what happens. Sure, it is possible that this could enact a chain of events that could end the world as we know it: Allies could turn to enemies, while weaker allies get swallowed up by the enemies our red/white/blue arrogance have already created; there could be no more ice for our slushy tropical mixed drinks, gas could hit $30 per gallon, head hunters could rise up again and make the South Pacific a new power player in the future of the planet, and on and on...

Or maybe, just maybe, the religious right are correct and The Rapture is on it's way, right?

Yeah, right.

Still, as much as it pains me to even consider the notion of yet another Repub administration, there just ain't enough on the other side convince me it's worth again risking jury duty as I don't see much difference. And no, I'm not endorsing McCain/Palin; but, I cannot help thinking how much fun it might be to watch people that now actually seem even more addle-headed than W. grab the reins and do whatever the fuck wacky shit is sure to come. It'd be kinda like "Risky Business", except with massive debt, rising international tensions/domestic discontent, and Sarah Palin sucking down Jello shots at 3PM while trying to remember where she put the nuclear codebook....

It's only scary if you don't have a sense of humor.