Grrr......I am having some bad luck with the computer these days!!  I am making a second attempt at this blog since the first attempt froze on me!!  *sigh*

So I have been in this bizarre state of depression for the last six months or so, a feeling to which I am not accustomed to.  And not one that I care for at all!  But somehow I don't seem to be able to get a grasp on my emotional state.  I am sure a large part of it has to do with my finances which are a bit of a disaster right now!  I have been struggling ridiculously since November, and have come to the conclusion that it is time for yet another change.   I have been self employed for several years now and have come to the conclusion that I am the worst boss that I have ever had!!!!  And so, I am firing myself....yep.

And so, I got a new job a few days ago!!  I don't start until March 31, but it should be a refreshing change...I am digressing back into the always exciting world of hospitality!!  It will be so refreshing to be forced into 40 hours a week of hard manual labor under the strong hand of the corporate world!!  I will still train my current clients in the mornings (Relax Elisa!!  Breathe into the paper bag..I'm not going anywhere!!) but the financial stability will be a welcome change...And the benefits are awesome!!  Even my animals have medical coverage...

Oh right!!  The job...I will be working at the Hotel Palomar in Westwood (a hotel owned by the Kimpton Hotel Group) as a bellman/valet.  Yes, I am going pack to parking cars and lugging bags!!  And I can't wait...It is a much needed change, and should fill those empty bored hours that I have been wasting daily for the last few years!!  And yes...the benefits or definitely a plus.

And so I continue to follow the 3 year pattern that I so often seem to fall into!!  Next Saturday will be my third re-birthday (for those who are unaware of what that means, it is the day that I walked away from the adult industry and rededicated my life to Christ!).   Don't get me wrong, I am far from perfect, but I am trying! I continue to pick myself up daily and thank God for his Grace and Mercy....I just pray that someday I will be the woman that God desires me to be!! *sigh*  Yet somehow I continue to struggle on a regular basis...

And so, I am hoping that these changes are going to take my life in the right direction!!  I look forward to meeting new people, seeing new things and enjoying some long work hours!!  I hope to have as few free hours as possible....And oh, paid vacations eventually!!! 

The next thing I need to change is my relationships....Perhaps when I am happy on a personal level again, then maybe I can find happiness with some else again as well...But one thing at a time!!  Who am I to rush God??  Every time I try I only end up making a mess of things...

But I do thank God for the most incredible and supportive family a girl could ever dream of being blessed with and some of the greatest friends that make me feel unworthy of their loyalty and unconditional friendship...

I could not be more blessed.