Forgive me y'all, had to get this one off my chest.

Friday, February 8th, 2008 marks the three year anniversary of my nephew's passing. Those that have Brown Study hopefully are familiar with the song "Heartbreak", which explains this entire situation in some detail.

Three years later and it still pains to think about it. We were pretty close for an uncle/nephew relationship, and I can remember the whole ordeal like it was yesterday.

I'm almost inclined to say that life just isn't fair, but we've all found that to be the case, I'm sure.

Thinking about his passing really makes me reflect on the fragility of each and every individual's life. The fact that life as we know it could be gone at any moment sometimes is a lot to accept, especially considering how I often take waking up everyday for granted. I try not to, but I'm human and consistently fall short.

Then I start to think about all the mistakes I've made, bad decisions, missteps in my relationships with other people, and the cycle just continues and continues. Next thing you know I start to question my abilities, then I get into this pattern of thought that isn't the healthiest for my well being. And so I write not only because of love for the artform, but because it's a coping mechanism----a way to channel those thoughts into some logical manner.

I probably don't make much sense right now, and all I know is that I miss my nephew, three years later. I also wish that losing a loved one wasn't so hard to deal with. Thank God that I've made it this far......I couldn't have done it without his help, and all withstanding, I'll keep pushing.

Life is rough sometimes.

Peace